Her Story
by Redrose120
Summary: Paul's imprinting story told in some different POV's, but mostly in the voice of his imprint; Tara. Her story, and how she feels about all of this. yeah, I suck at summaries, I know. R&R please
1. Welcome to La Push

**This is only the first chapter, hope you like it. More is to come. Please review (: I own nothing!! :P though I wish I did!  
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I had always been the new girl. Always moving around, no balance in my life, the longest my family ever stayed in one place was five months. It was really hard on me and I knew it wasn't good for my younger brother Toby, though he liked it far too much and it wasn't healthy. It was so far from healthy, we were all pretty messed up. Like gypsies, my mother used to say, when I told her I wanted to stay in one place. "Were gypsies on new and exciting adventures," Now I thought it was bull. I think it had to do with the fact neither my mother of my stepfather could hold a steady job for more than two months.

I didn't know that our family would be allowed on the rez in La Push, our not being from the area and all, but they welcomed us with open arms, apparently any natives were welcome in the town, even if we were just natives from British Columbia. We had to go to a council meeting to see what the elders had to say about us moving onto the land first but they left it up to some guy named Sam Uley. We all stood in this little room, Town Hall I guess, and there are all these stone faced old men from the tribe asking us harmless questions but they said that they couldn't make a decision until this Sam person got there. I expected him to be this really old guy too and when he finally arrives, his hair all wind blown, his shirt undone, he's this guy not four years older than I am, twenty one at the most, though he looked to be in his mid- twenties I could still tell he was young. My mouth dropped open at the sight of him. He was at least 6'8 and his chest was built up of nothing but muscles.

He glided over casually to my family and their reactions were much the same as mine when I glanced over at them, mouths dropped, "What are your intentions on our land?" He asked, getting to the point, in a husky voice, he wasn't bad looking I noted, being a typical teenager. I also noticed he looked preoccupied, like his mind was elsewhere, worrying, I had gotten good at the signs of worry because when my mom was worried, that was the time we would usually start looking to move again.

"We want to rent a house and build a life here." Clark, my step-dad, answered. I almost laughed. 'Build a life here'?! That was a joke, I guessed that if we were lucky we would stay for three months, four because of the beautiful landscape my mother seemed to really love.

Sam smiled, it was genuine, but I could tell he didn't do it often. He didn't seem the type, he was the serious type. So serious, I couldn't take him seriously. "Then you are welcomed to La Push." he said "Now if you excuse me I have some engagements that need tending to."

"Thank you," my mother said, I thought she would swoon she was so intoxicated, Sam Uley would be all we would be hearing about for the next two weeks 'Did you SEE his biceps?! Gawd, how'd he get like THAT' or 'Clark, maybe you should head to the gym and get a work out...' like some teenager with a crush, I was the most mature figure in our family and that seemed pretty sad.

"It isn't a problem, really. Now Mr. Black will help you get settled, if you will Billy? I really have to go." Sam was pressed for time I knew, but ghesh! It wasn't like vampires were seizing the town or anything...

Sam nodded to me as he turned to go and I turned purple with embarrassment, I'm sure. I wasn't exactly attracted to him and his seriousness but I mean, come on; he's pretty darn good looking. An older man with leather skin wheeled over to us in his wheel chair, a great big grin on his face "Welcome to La Push." Billy Black said "Do you have any idea where you want to live in the area?"

"Well right now anything will do." Clark said.

"Were living in a hotel!" Toby announced. My mother, Heather, shushed him but Billy Black just laughed.

"I have a boy too. His name is Jacob. While we adults get everything figured out on where you're going to live why doesn't he show you two around" I clenched my teeth, not wanting to spend my time babysitting two eight-year-olds. Billy looked at me, his dark eyes almost laughing "Jacob's about your age I think, Tara, is it?"

I smiled, happy he understood "Yeah, its Tara. How old is he?"

"Almost seventeen"

"Bit- I mean, that's great. Where is he?" I didn't want to swear in front of an elder, I mean, it wouldn't be right, would it? But Billy laughed, I would definitely like this old guy.

"He won't be around for about twenty minutes, busy with some friends I'm afraid. He'll be along shortly though."

"Okay,"

It didn't take that long, actually, even though I didn't know it was him, Jacob came in only moments later. He was this huge guy, like Sam Uley, and my jaw dropped again. He looked about twenty-five, though his face did betray some child like features. His hair fell over his face, long, but not like hockey hair, yet I don't think he would be able to fit it in a ponytail. It suited him. He came over to us and he was super tall, Sam's height, maybe even taller. And he was just as well built.

"Here's Jacob now," Billy said casually, unmoved by his sixteen year old sons massive appearance.

Jacob Black grinned widely at us "Hey," the smile lit up all of his features and he seemed warm, reminding me of the sun. With that one smile it warmed me up inside and I felt myself smile back "Hey," I replied with a smile of my own.

"Jake, I need you to show Tara and Toby around town, get them used to things, introduce them to your friends maybe." there was something behind him when Billy said theis that I didnt understand.

Jacobs smile faltered momentarily but recovered quickly "Well Seth, Paul and Leah are out with Sam but the others are down at the Cafe Red." Billy nodded and then turned to my parents "Don't worry Jake knows this place inside and out, they'll be safe with him"

"No kidding" Clark breathed, Jacob laughed a loud, cheery booming thing which made me giggle slightly.

"There's really no danger in La Push anyway, our protectors keep us safe" Protectors? were they like some spirits to warn off bad presences? Too superstitious for me but I didn't say anything.

"Now in this area there is..." Billy started to talk to my parents about locations and good housing, _real estate, _I cringed at that words_,_ and Jacob rolled his eyes dramatically.

"Come on, when he starts talking about La Push's real estate around here there's no stopping him." I laughed and Billy pocked him in Jacob's giant ribs, I didn't know how he could reach from his wheelchair "Come on old man, you wanna go?" Jacob challenged jokingly, raising his fists, jumping around.

"No, I'm too afraid I'd hurt you. You don't want none of my skillage." It sounded so odd to hear an old man talk like that, I laughed, we all laughed. "You three should go now this stuff is going to bore you."

We walked from the hall into the bright sunshine, the ride here it had been nothing but rain. It rained a lot in Washington I had found.

"I think you'll like La Push." Jacob stated matter of factly, smiling as we left the hall. I smiled too. Something deep within me told me I would like this place too. La Push seemed more to me than just another place to go for two months until my parents got bored with it. Maybe it was just because I had a friend already. Maybe it was only a feeling but it was still meant I felt something for this place, more so than any other town we'd moved to before. I sensed change coming and I wasn't afraid. I wanted things to happen, I wanted to live my life here. Like a deep sense of belonging that I had never felt. Even before I had met the person, people, who would eventually become my life.


	2. Meeting the Gang

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**Sorry if they're some mistakes in it, I really wanted to get it posted it tonight :P**

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We walked about three streets in silence. It was nice just enjoying the beautiful, sunny day. I hadn't really been outside just to enjoy the view or to go for a walk since we lived in Maine and that was six weeks ago. I enjoyed the warm breeze and the carefree way Jacob walked beside us, even though I was sure he was going slower than he probably would be doing if Toby and I weren't there because of his long legs.

Toby was gawking at him and I poked his ribs 'stop staring!' I hissed, low so Jacob wouldn't hear, though his lips seemed to curl and it looked as if he was surpressing a smile.

"You're huge!" Toby exclaimed, ignoring my warnings, as always. Like my mother would, I shushed him. Jacob laughed though, it was really uplifting.

"Yeah, I know. Once I was your height though." Jacob Black said.

"Really?" Toby breathed.

"Yupp, and do you know how I got this big?"

"How?" Toby was mystified bye this sixteen year old god. That's what Jacob was in Toby's eyes. Some superhero that was going to give him advice on how to become like him.

"By listening to my older sisters." He glanced at me and I gave him a grateful smile. I would be friends easily with Jacob Black.

"Yeah right," Toby scoffed, though he did stop staring at Jacob with his mouth hanging open.

We came to a small building with giant letters that read 'Cafe Red'. It was small and wooden and looked more like a small cabin than anything. It was also welcoming and warm.

"This place is great. My friend Leah works here and even though she hates it we wont let her quit because of the discounts." Jacob grinned.

"That's kind of cruel" I observed.

"Oh yeah, were the cruel ones," he said under his breath, hoping I didn't hear most likely. I didn't pry. Maybe he had some bad relationship status with her, I knew all about those. Well, actually I had no idea because I'd never had a boyfriend personally, but I had made friends with this really popular girl in New York and she had a new boyfriend every week. That's all I ever heard was 'Jason's being an idiot, he was two minutes early for our date and I wasn't ready!' or 'Ronnie won't take me to dinner tonight because he was to visit his mom in the hospital' or 'I don't think Corier likes my new shoes, will you come shopping with me for new ones'. That's about the time when I made a mental note to never make friends with a popular girl the next time we moved, or ever again. They were all so self centred. Though there were upsides. People paid more respect to you and you were never on the outs, you knew everything that was happening in and out of school. But the price was too high; I never wanted to have to listen to another scratchy voice telling me that my pants were out of style from two months ago. Sorry if we aren't all rich! Maybe I was bitter, so what?

The wooden room was large but crowded with all of the people in it. Actually there only seemed to be a few people in there but their bodies were taking up most of the room. There were three really big buys, like Jacob but they were all really different looking. One was shorter, but still well over six feet, he was laughing at a joke that he had most likely made. The one next to him was quite tall, not as tall as Jacob, again, but taller than the really muscled one. His hair wasn't in the same style as the shorter one. It was floppy and loose. The third one was a half-inch shorter than the second and he had his arm around a girl. She was pretty plain looking and he seemed to have positioned himself as id he was protecting her, like if anything were to happen he would be ready to throw himself in front of her to save her. There was a girl behind the counter, Leah I guessed. She was average looking, brown hair and nice skin. Nothing that really stood out though. The girl looked bored back there and I felt bad that she was stuck with a job she hated because her friends liked the discounts. When the door slammed shut they all turned around, except for the one behind the counter who was already facing us.

"Hey guys," Jacob said casually.

"Hey Jake, Who's the girl..and..uh..the kid?" The shorter one said.

"This is Tara and Toby Conway. They're moving here. Remember the meeting Sam had to go this morning, it's because the council was too paranoid and couldn't make a decision." Jacob Black laughed.

"Ghesh she sure looks like she could pass for a Quileute, are you sure you aren't?" It was true, I looked really native. I had long, dark hair and copper skin. My mom said my dad was Native Canadian and they had met just outside of his reservation. I apparently look just like him, which I'm not sure if it's a compliment or not, my being a girl and all, but my mom assured me that it was good. He died when I was two and I barely remember him. We were more financially stable when he was alive was all I remember. "Nope, just from British Columbia Canada."

"I'd like to go to Canada" the shorter one said with a far off look in his eyes. It made me laugh.

"N'eway, let me introduce you two to the gang. Quil," the shorter one "Embry," the tall one "Jared and his, uh, girlfriend," Jacob faltered "Kim." the guy with his arm around the plain girl. Actually her eyes were incredibly pretty I just noticed, almond shaped and dark, maybe she wasn't so plain. When Jacob said Kim's name Jared smiled down at her, it was intense and he really seemed to be in love with her. It was sweet and, intense. He took her hand and kissed it. She blushed and Jared pushed the hair away from her face. I had to look away, it seemed so personal. I think I was also slightly jealous. No one ever looked at me like that, and I guessed no one ever would. I wasn't the type that really put herself out there for guys. Not that Kim seemed that way but I didn't know how she got a guy like Jared, he seemed no offence intended, a little out of her league. It almost gave me hope that someone like me could find someone who would one day look at me with that caring, I was the only one in the world look in his eyes.

But then I remembered- this was reality. Jacob cleared his throat loudly; I think he saw that Toby was making a face. No one except actors in movies acted like that. Jared's head shot up immediately but he didn't let go of Kim's hand.

"And this is Ann McShift," Jacob finished. I guess it wasn't Leah. Oh right! Jacob said she was out with Sam. "She's filling in for Leah today."

"Yeah. She called me this morning and said she needed me to fill in. I was sort of ticked but it sounded important so I let it go. She owes me one now though." Ann grinned and turned to me "Hi" she said with a smile and I smiled back at them all.

"Hey," Toby said, tugging on my hand "Buy me a cookie." he more demanded than asked me.

"I don't have any money." We never had any money.

"S'okay, it's on the house." Ann said.

"No, I don't think I can do that." I told her.

"Why not?" Toby whined.

"Why don't I start you on a tab then. Later you can come back and pay." Ann suggested.

"Please," Toby begged

"Alright. One."

"Chocolate double chunk" Toby finished, rushing over to find a stool at the counter.

"Come sit with us," Kim said, motioning to two empty seats next to her. I didn't think there was much more room left at the table but Jacob moved forward so I did too.

"So what's Canada like?" Embry asked, putting his giant hand under his chin so it supported his head.

"Wouldn't really know. We never stayed. I've lived everywhere, mostly throughout the states though. My step dad's from Virginia, where my mom met him. Now we travel around the states aimlessly. It's so annoying. We have no balance; our schooling is so messed up. I hate their lifestyle." I hadn't meant to say too much but it was just so easy to talk to normal people and their faces were all so friendly.

"That's horrible," Jacob said after no one spoke, not knowing what to say because of my angry tone when I said what I did.

"No, it's great!" Toby said with his mouthful of cookie.

I shook my head "Swallow." I warned.

The group laughed at Toby's lack of manners.

"Are you going to be staying long here?" Ann asked at the counter.

"I hope to but knowing my mom and Clark we wont stay past winter." It was the end of August now.

"Well we hope you stay too," Kim said, smiling with her full lips, another good feature of hers.

"Thanks." Another silence and, again, Jacob broke it.

"So when are the others coming back?"

"Uhh, were suppose to meet them at Emily's in an hour to go over, uh, patterns." Quil answered.

"Ah," Jacob answered, I was sure there was more behind this then they were telling.

"Did they find anything that...?" Jacob trailed off.

"Jake...I'm... I'm really sorry.." Embry said lowly. The rest of them bowed their heads down, almost apologetically. I looked at Jacob, he was trembling slightly. His fist came down hard on the table and it broke, he didn't even wince but I jumped. The rest of the others expressions, except for Toby's (who was just as shocked as mine) stayed the same, unsurprised by his outburst.

"DAMN IT!!" he screamed, shaking more violently this time. He turned to me and said threw gritted teeth "Look, I'm sorry I have to go. Embry, you'll drive them back to the hall?" Embry nodded. Jacob continued, "We'll hang out tomorrow." he promised. Then he pushed his chair, which smashed against the wall, out of his way and stormed fast out of the Cafe Red.

Ann looked afraid too and Jared was hugging Kim. Quil looked really sad, his grin gad vanished. Embry was shaking his head, staring at the floor. I was definitely missing something. Finally Quil stood up "I'm going after him."

"Sit down Quil, he's pissed and it won't do any good. You know how stubborn he is." Jared told him.

"No, you know who's going to be pissed? Sam. Sam's going to be livid and you know who's going to get the brunt of it? Us. We have to calm him down." Quil argued, answering his own questions.

"There's no god damn calming Jacob down when it comes to Bella and the b- him! So sit down!" Embry said, he was getting ticked too.

"Well he has to learn that she wasn't for him." Quil argued.

This time Kim spoke "Quil, you'll just end up getting hurt."

"I can handle him."

"Remember last year when Paul made his comment, not even he can handle Jake when it comes to her." Embry told his friend. I was totally lost in heir conversation, confused that Jacob had left.

"Leave it to Sam to talk to him. Remember when he left, Sam convinced him to come back, didn't he?" Jared added.

"Yeah, I guess." Quil was becoming defeated.

Jared looked at me and then shifted him eyes to the ground "I don't really think this is the place to discuss it either. We should probably go to Emily's soon."

Embry found a smile for me but it seemed forced. "Come on, I'll take you two back to your parents."

"See you tomorrow," Kim said with the best smile she could manage. The rest of them said small goodbyes too, trying to be polite but I could tell they were all concerned. I had absolutely no idea what anyone was talking about. Who was Bella? Jacob didn't really seem the type that had that big of a temper. I had just seen some of it though and it was scary. No one but Sam could calm him down? And Paul. What happened between Bella, Jacob and Paul? None of this made sense at all.

As we were leaving I heard Ann speaking lowly to Kim and Jared "If he thinks just because his hormones are all funky because of this girls and because he's Leah's friend he doesn't have to pay for the damage he's insane."

"Just give it a rest Ann!" Jared roared.

Embry had a big black Jeep. It was old and the seats were worn but it was comfortable.

"Did you SEE Jacob kill that table!" Toby was enthralled.

"Stop it Toby." I warned, and I was serious.

Embry started the Jeep and the engine revved.

"So what was that all about?" I had to know and wasn't sure if he would tell me on his own.

Embry sighed deeply "Its a long, long story. Summary is Jacob fell for a girl who was left heartbroken by some, er, guy, I guess," he didn't know what to call him it seemed. "Jake really loved her and Bella loved him too. Then the scumbag came back and she took him with open arms. They got married a few weeks back from now."

"Then what was that outburst for?" If they had been married for weeks why was Jacob so angry about it now. No one had mentioned Bella's name when Jacob was there.

"Well it's more complicated then you could ever imagine."

"Care to elaborate?"

"It's not my story to tell. I'm sorry." That was the end of that.

We arrived at the hall after a few minutes of driving in silence. "I'm sorry, really. Jake's not usually like that. He's great, just a lovesick puppy who fell for someone he cant have. He'll be better tomorrow. I promise. Come tomorrow to the cafe at around noon. Leah and Paul will be around and you can meet them. Maybe even Emily will come, she's Sam's fiancé. Emily's great. She makes these amazing muffins that- uhm... well see you tomorrow?" I laughed.

"Yeah, do you mind if I don't bring my little brother though?" Toby was already out of the car standing where Billy and my parents were talking.

"I think that would be a smart idea actually." he gave me a real smile now.

"Hey, if you see Jacob, tell him I'm really sorry about whatever happened."

Embry shook his head slowly and sadly "I will," he promised. "But don't worry about him, okay?"

"Thanks for the ride." I walked over to my parents as Embry pulled away.

"...And then he pushed the chair away and it slammed into the side of the wall. In at least a thousand pieces!" My little brother was retelling the story in detail of what happened. I wasn't planning on giving any details, just saying when my parents asked if we had fun "Yeah, the kids around here are all really nice. I think we'll be fast friends."

Billy Black's face went pale, and that's pretty hard to do when your Native American. "I forgot I have a meeting with Sam tonight and I should go" his voice was shaky and I felt bad. He probably knew it was about this Bella too. Why would she ever take the jerk that left her back? (**Authors note: I know, because it's Edward Freaking Cullen!!**) Poor Jacob. Maybe she just wasn't for him though. Maybe he should move on.

That night at the hotel my mom asked what we wanted to do the next day, our house wouldn't be ready for three days.

"I have plans with the kids in La Push" I answered.

Heather's lips formed an O shape but she quickly recovered from her momentary shock "Really? Do you think that's such a good idea? From what we heard today that Jacob doesn't seem so stable"

"Mom, he just had his heartbroken, I think he has a right to be a little mad about this whole thing." He had every right to be pissed off. Also I really wanted to go back tomorrow, to see how Jacob was holding up and to see the others friendly faces. I was happy I finally had friends. And I also wanted to meet Paul and Leah. And Emily, Sam's fiancé, to see if she was also as serious as the handsome Sam my mother had a crush on. She had already mentioned him numerous times in random conversations when we got back to the hotel. Clark didn't like it very much.

"And Jacob isn't dangerous. He's super nice and willing to be friends. I never get opportunities like this and I don't think I should pass up my one chance at friends." I would win this argument I was sure.

"Well I doubt that its your only opportunity to make friends," but... "But he does seem like a pleasant boy and you seem to like the others fine too so I suppose we could drive you tomorrow" She knew I was right. I didn't make friends easily on my own.

"At noon" I told her.

"Right, at noon. I want you to take your cell phone though in case you need us to come pick you up or anything. We will be going site seeing tomorrow in La Push I think so we won't be far and Clark will have his phone on him."

"I'll be fine Mom."

So tomorrow I would be going back to La Push. I hoped Jacob wouldn't be too upset. I looked forward to meeting the mysterious Paul and Leah too. I hoped they liked me. Wasn't there another? Seth maybe? Was that his name? Would he be coming? No one mentioned that he would.

As I tried to fall asleep that night I wondered about Jacob and Bella and the types of conversations they had. I wondered what Paul looked like, and what he had said about this Bella. She seemed to have played a big part in all of their lives. I thought about what we would do tomorrow. I wondered if Jacob would even show. Jared said he had left before, what if he would again? I wondered also about the guy that Bella had left Jacob for, if he was handsome and charming. **(Hell yeah, its EDWARD FREAKING CULLEN!!)**

Finally I was tired of thinking and wondering and decided I didn't want to anymore so I turned my MP3 onto Muse and eventually fell asleep.

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**I know it seems like this is going to be a Jacob imprint story but I swear he's just Tara's friend in it. Sorry I still haven't gotten too much on Paul but I PROMISE he WILL be in the next chapter. **

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	3. Paul

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**candelifera- Yes, Bella was transformed. She also left, is no longer in Forks. None of the Cullens are.**

** Chapter 3 Baby!!**

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I woke up and it was raining. I still hadn't gotten used to the rain yet. The walls in the hotel room were damp and the floors creaky. No birds were singing outside and there were big fat worms in the parking lot outside. This weather would usually depress me but I was too excited for my own self-indulgent right now. I was anxious to get down to La Push. To see if Jacob was any better. To meet Paul and Leah and Emily. To see if anyone would tell me more about this insane love story that takes place in all of their lives.

Clark had no idea how to locate Cafe Red and was too proud to ask for directions. I promised them I would be able to find it fine if they just dropped me off at Town Hall.

"Are you sure you have the phone?" Heather asked me for the thousandth time.

"Yes, Mom." I rolled my eyes and I was sure she saw it. My behaviour was ignored.

"Good. Now if there are _any_ problems, any at all, just give us a call and we'll be there." Right because Clark found the place so easily the first time. I loved sarcasm.

"Yeah, right Mom. I got it. We might not stay at the cafe though. I think I'll ask Jacob if he'll show me the beach. I read in a pamphlet that it was pretty beautiful." Love my vocabulary? 'pretty beautiful'? Wow. Not to self: get a thesaurus.

"Okay, but if Jacob looks like he's starting to loose his temper again..."

"Mom! He's harmless!"

"Well he's a big guy and I don't want you to get hurt." Heather was too overprotective.

"Yeah, okay Mom. I have to go now or I'll be late. I'll call you later when I want to be picked up. Bye, have fun sight seeing." I slammed the car door behind me, hoping to make an impression. My mother never noticed when I was frustrated with her and it made me even more ticked off.

I walked the same direction we did yesterday. It was easy for me to remember the way to the cafe. It only took me about five minutes.

Jacob stood outside the small wooden building, his large frame leaning against the post on the patio. Is that what you'd call it? Outdoor sitting area maybe?

He greeted me with a huge grin, standing up straight. "Hey," he said happily. It was much better to see him with a grin on his wide face.

"Hey," I replied, the same as yesterday.

"I hope you don't mind if we meet the guys down at Emily and Sam's. She just made a batch of these amazing cookies and no one wanted to come and meet you with me. It's not you, no one can compete with Emily's cooking."

"Yeah, I figured when Embry was talking about it yesterday. He had a fit of ecstasy just talking about it." Jacob laughed.

Jacob had a Rabbit. A real, 1986, Volkswagen Rabbit. I knew it right away. My best friend, the only real friend I'd had prior moving here, was Alex Plonks. He really wanted this car, wanted it bad. Apparently some third class movie star drove one. The guy was over rated in my opinion but Alex really liked him. Alex showed me a bunch of pictures the car and told me how desperate he was to get his hands on one.

"Holy crap! If my friend Alex was here he'd give you his grandmother for this car!" I ran my fingers over the paint on the car top.

Jacob laughed "It's really just a piece of junk. I love it though. Built it myself."

"Seriously!" I was amazed. "That's freaking awesome!" Jacob seemed to like my reaction and had a slight smile on his face the whole drive to Sam and Emily's. I didn't want to ruin his mood by mentioning yesterday so my mouth stayed shut. His did too. It wasn't an awkward silence, we were comfortable.

We reached the little house in no time flat. Jake, what he told me to call him in one of our small conversations on the way there, likes to drive fast. Really fast. I loved it, all the windows were down and my hair was flying everywhere. It was blood pumping and definitely woke my senses.

A group of people were standing outside the house. I recognised a lot from yesterday but there were more now.

Another boy, if you can call him that. He was enormous! Smaller than Embry, still not as tall as Jacob I'd say, but still, it was pretty impressive. What the hell were they feeding these kids?! Whatever it is, I want some! Well, he was facing the other way and I couldn't see his face but I guessed he was Paul. And a girl, either Emily or Leah, was really pretty. She was standing tall too, almost six feet tall herself. She was muscled and her skin was smooth and tan. She looked like she could be a model. And I also noticed she held her own around all the boys. She stood, almost trying to hold her ground, even though no one was a threat.

"Hey, Jake." Quil greeted.

"Hi Tara," Kim smiled at me. "Glad you came."

Leah glanced at me, bored it seemed, and walked into the little house. Paul casually turned after finishing a conversation with Jared. All of a sudden our eyes met and he went rigid. It seemed as if he had been stunned. He stood extremely still, staring at me, through me, INTO me. I stood still too, staring back. I didn't know what he was doing.

It was if he couldn't force himself to look away. I didn't hear the voices around me though I knew Jacob, standing beside me was talking. I tried to listen but it was hard.

"So what's everyone doing outside?" I think he asked.

"Emily kicked us out. I guess she doesn't like taste testers too much." Quil laughed.

"Do you want to meet her? I think she wouldn't mind if you-" Jacob stopped. Was he talking to me? I was still staring back at Paul. He started trembling, much the same as Jacob had yesterday but more violently.

"Paul? Paul? What's up? Do you..." Jared's voice trailed off. A number of emotions were travelling through Paul's eyes it seemed. Shock, happiness, hurt, and anger were the ones I recognised but there were many more. What was happening to him? I think he was a bit young to be having a stroke, but odder things had happened. Maybe he had a medical condition. His eyes were still locked with mine and it seemed he didn't have an intention of breaking his spell so I could look away.

"Oh my god!" Jared yelled. I could hear again. I was aware of them all now but I still didn't look away. I couldn't, not until he released me. His brown eyes were questioning and angry and confused. I wanted to reach out and help him but I couldn't move.

"Oh my god..." Quil(?), repeating Jared's question.

"Did he...?" Kim?

"Paul...?" Jacob?

Finally he spoke, "STAY AWAY FROM ME!!" he roared at me and booked it into the woods.

I looked up at Jacob; he seemed as bewildered as me, but not more so. I was still the one who was most shocked. I looked around at all of the faces in front of me. They all had their mouths gaping open. Suddenly Sam was outside, as well as whom I guessed was Emily, and Leah. Sam was shaking his head slightly and Emily had oven mitts on. She was pretty and had something wrong with her face but I hardly noticed. I was too shocked.

What had I done to Paul? Nothing. I had done or said nothing to or about him. So what was that all about? He wanted me to stay away from him? Fine then, I would. I didn't need him to like me. The others had nothing against me. Or maybe they did, but they were at least nice to me. Should I go? No one made any move. They were stunned; this was the reaction I expected yesterday from them when Jacob made his display.

"Should we..." Embry broke the silence.

"No." Sam was firm, about what though I wasn't sure.

"I'm going to talk to him." Jacob was firm too and Sam didn't object, he just nodded. "Bring her to the beach tonight, around six. We'll meet you there." Jacob gave me a sad smile and headed into the woods in the same direction Paul had gone.

Someone put their arm around me I noticed and guided me into the house. It smelt really good in there. "Sit down." A soft voice ordered. It was Emily. I nodded absently as she sat down beside me. Everyone looked so forlorn but I didn't have time to think about why. I was still thinking about that strange guy outside who just screamed at me. It didn't make any sense.

Sam sighed deeply and leaned against the table. He pinched the bridge of his nose and then finally spoke "Someone better call Billy, we need to hold a meeting. Immediately."

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**Soooo, there it is. From here on out Paul is going to be a major character. The next chapter is pretty well done, I just have to change some things.  
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	4. Jacob's Encounter

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**wishIhadwings- Yes I have thought of doing some Paul P.O.V. (as you can see I also now have some of Jakes) but I'm not sure where I can fit it in at this point. I do have some ideas but you'll just have to wait a little while for me to get there :P**

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Jacob's P.O.V.

Okay, so this wasn't good. This was really bad. Paul imprinting? His temper was so bad and if Tara... No. This was definitely not good. I had to talk to him. I hadn't imprinted yet, I never expected to (and no one ever thought Paul would either, actually), but I'd seen it in Sam and Jared and Quil's memories. And it wasn't like I'd ever been in love... I wouldn't let myself to think about that right now. I had to help Paul. I had to tell him it would be okay. I needed to do something. Something.

I phased as soon as I got into the woods and bolted after Paul. I could see where he was. He was running fast, faster than he ever had. I almost wasn't a match for him. He'd never run this fast when we fought the bloodsuckers. And then all of a sudden his thoughts meshed with mine.

'_Phase back Jacob,_' I heard him growl.

'_No. We're talking._' He thoughts flooded into me. He was re-living one of Sam's memories. The one with Emily and the day he had...hurt her. Only instead of seeing Emily's terrified face, it was Tara's. This angered me and I growled as pain ripped through me at this memory and thought '_Stop it!_'.

His thoughts were clouded with worry and pain and anger. He had been urging himself away, farther and farther, also willing himself to go back to her.

He wanted to hold her, to protect her. That's what we were, right? Protectors. But what if he was the one she had to be protected from? When I no longer heard his thoughts I knew he had phased back into his human form. I quickly smelled him out. Paul had gotten farther than I thought he did. To the end of La Push's borders- the farthest he could be away from Tara and still be in La Push.

I spotted him, sitting with his head tilted down, on a broken tree. It had just fallen, I could tell because it wasn't rotting and knew instantly that Paul had been the one who broke it.

"Go back Jacob." He wasn't going to fight with me? Paul, PAUL, had finally been broken? I paid no attention to his demand and sat down beside him, almost breaking the tree in half.

"Look, this can be a good thing." I began.

He scoffed "Yeah, it's really a great thing I imprinted alright."

"Do you think sarcasm is really going to help you right now?" I asked.

Paul sighed deep and put him face in his hands "What the hell am I going to do? I want to be with her. Its killing me right now to be away from her but I - what if I hurt her, Jake?" And what comes next I NEVER thought would EVER happen. Paul, PAUL, THE Paul, started to cry. He didn't even try to hide it. "You saw what happened with Sam and Emily. You saw it, Jacob. And Sam has the best control of all of us and you know how much he loves Emily. If that happened with him, if he lost control around her then..." His voice trailed off, weak. More tears came and I found myself looking away. Even though we weren't in our wolf form, his pain still hurt me. Paul was the toughest out of all of us and if he was crying...

"What do you think I would do to her? I have the worst temper out of all of us, and the worst control. I'd kill her. I can't let that happen. I'm a monster. God I hate this! I HATE this!!" Paul stood up and kicked the tree. Then he kicked it again. And multiple times after that, repetitively, making grunting noises. He had stopped crying and I looked at him now. The tree was starting to break up and I stood up and watched him break the tree into little splinters and twigs with his kicks. Finally I had enough.

"Paul! Stop it!" I grabbed his shoulders and made him look at me. "Sam was new at this and alone. You have all of us for support, to help you keep your control. We would never let anything happen and I really doubt you would let anything happen to her either."

Paul looked at the dirt and didn't say anything. Minutes past and finally he sighed and sat down on the ground, next to the mutilated tree.

"I could kill her Jacob." He said quietly.

"Yeah," I agreed. "You could. And you could kill Seth. You could kill Kim. You could kill almost anybody Paul, okay? But it doesn't mean your going to. Especially not your imprint."

"But if I ever lost it when she was around-" I cut him off.

"But you won't. You can't. If you ever felt a phase coming you'd leave. Just like you did today."

"I was afraid... I was afraid for the first time since..." his voice trailed off but then started again, stronger "I was afraid that I wanted her so much. I needed her. She's the only one Jake." He gave a weak smile "You guys didn't exist anymore and when she looked at me...God I don't know how to explain it. She's perfect. And then when I realised what happened I was so mad... Just PISSED that I was such a monster, that if I got too close...Sam's memories flooded into me and I had to warn her to stay away. I was so disgusted that I was the one thing that could hurt her the most and that I also wanted to protect her. This is the only way Jacob. Understand that it's better if I stay away from her." And suddenly it came crashing sown on top of me, it made it hard to breath. That's what that blo- Edward Cullen had been trying to explain to me. What Bella had tried to tell me. I found it hard to believe then but now... I think I understood. And then I thought of Bella...No, Paul. I had to think of Paul now. Bella and I had our time and now I have to move forward.

I can't be depressed when Paul is going through this now. I have to think of him.

"I'm a monster Jake." He shook his head. "This is so hard. Promise you won't let me get near her."

"No." I tried to shake my last thoughts of Bella from my mind and focus completely on Paul now, it didn't work too great, but I tried. "That will kill you Paul. I can't watch you suffer like that. It's too much, being forbidden to be away from a person..." Too personal, too personal... "And your not even forbidden from seeing her! God that's what pisses ME off about this whole thing. She's solely yours! She's the one your MEANT to be with, and you don't want to even see her!?" I shook my head in a disgusted manner. "Seriously, Paul, you don't even know how lucky you are."

"I never said I didn't want to see her!" He growled viciously and started to tremble.

"Calm down, Paul." I said, becoming aware of the temper I forgot he had.

"Jacob," he spoke to me, calming slowly "I'm sorry about this. I'm sorry about Bella. I'm sorry our lives are crappy. But I'm not dragging Tara down into this mess of a life I have. I'm sorry we can't be normal. But honestly, your acting like you know me personally." Wow. What a statement coming from a guy who shares his every feeling with a pack of werewolves.

"Well who DOES, actually, know you better than I do? I am one of the pack, and I DO know most of your thoughts and feelings."

"You don't know bull about Me." he spoke low but I could hear the words clearly. True, none of the pack really knew anything about Paul's past. He never thought of a time past when he was the age of thirteen. None of us knew about his childhood, though we had all come up with different possibilities. It was strange that we really didn't know Paul even existed for a while. Until Jared befriended him, no one even knew his name. He didn't ever have friends before Jared, they had become friends in eighth grade, and he loned it before that time.

"I know a lot more about you than you know though. I know you'll tear yourself apart trying to fight fate and end up just hurting yourself and everyone else in the end."

Again, Paul was silent for a long time. I wondered what he was thinking about. After about a half an hour he sighed and stood up.

"Do you think she'll like me?" Paul grinned and I knew he was happy just thinking about her.

"Yeah," I grinned back, standing up. "Why wouldn't she like a masochistic monster like you?"

"Thanks Jacob." And I knew he meant it.

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	5. Girls Day

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**Okay, so Chapter 5!**

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**vintage bluejeans, HelloSexy, candelifera, said dance, and ****wishIhadwings****. You people are freaking amazing. Thanks for the reviews!! :D**

**vintage bluejeans- I wrote Jacob as the one going to talk to Paul for a number of reasons. Yes, Jared has been Paul's best friend but at the time Kim was freaking out. She was really afraid for Tara and Jared had to stay and comfort her. Second, Jacob is second in command after Sam and Sam had to go talk to Billy and the elders about this 'situation'. So Jake kind of assumed his position. Third, I think that we wouldn't have the same feeling if another member of the pack went to see Paul. Jacob was already more of a major character in this story and I felt it would make more sense to write it in Jacobs P.O.V. I do understand where you were coming from though and I hope you understand a bit better now, if not I'm sorry I confused you more :P**

**wishIhadwings- Yay! I'm happy that made your day (:  
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Tara's P.O.V.

Shortly after Sam made his phone call he left with Embry, Quil, Jared. It seemed Leah really wanted to go but Sam made her stay. They had a big argument but Sam won in the end, this made Leah livid. "I'm one of you just as much as they are!" She fumed. What was she going on about? Woman's rights? Right at this second? Where were they going that was so important? Oh right, to Billy Black's house to discuss something. A meeting. He had said it needed to be held _immediately_.

Only Leah, Emily, Kim, and I were left in the small house. Emily kept giving me little sympathetic looks but I wasn't sure exactly why or what they were for.

"We'll have a girls day, that sounds good doesn't it? Just the four of us? No stupid boys dragging us down?" Emily busied herself with her kitchen duties.

"So what's Paul's deal?" I asked, everything was so quiet here. Emily pulled a pan of really good smelling cookies from the oven and it made my mouth water a little.

"Oh," she sighed. "He just has a some anger issues, that's all. Don't you worry about it." Emily smiled but it was, again, a sympathetic one. I wanted to scream at her to stop it, that I didn't do anything to deserve that look. Or did I?

"Well what did I do to anger him?" Someone tell me before I go mad. Please!

"It... It wasn't you." And? Come on, I know there's more to it than that.

"Well he seemed to be yelling at me." I looked to Leah, who was still fuming, sitting across from my chair on the old sofa. She didn't like loosing to Sam. Why did she even listen to him? If she wanted to go nothing was stopping her, it was a free country after all.

Then I looked at Kim, hoping she would add to Emily's comment but she just mixed a bowl Emily had given her, a job to keep busy with. I remembered the conversation Jared and her had before they headed out.

_"So, do you think he...?" Kim didn't finish her sentence but Jared seemed to understand._

_"Yes. You know what this will mean?"_

_Kim shook her head no._

_"Neither do I but it can't mean anything good." He kissed her forehead gently._

_"I'll be back soon. I know that they're your boys but please, don't worry." Sam said softly to Emily._

With that, they left. What was she not supposed to worry about? I wasn't supposed to find this odd? Paul seemed like an ordinary teenager when Jacob and I showed up and then when he saw me it was like he was someone totally new and mental. What I didn't understand was though was what had I done? Was it even me? Was Emily right? Had I done nothing at all and it was just Paul? Maybe he did have a medical condition after all. Maybe he had a fit. I didn't know him at all so it couldn't have possibly been me I. Yes, that's what I decided.

"Paul just has a nasty temper. Maybe one of the others had said something but he was just staring at you when he said it. You are very pretty Tara." Great, try to charm me. Distract me from the truth. Not suspicious at all. Aha, sarcasm, my old friend, what would I do without you?

"Thanks." I mumbled.

"Emily, can I show Tara your garden?" Well it's nice to see Leah finally woke up.

Emily gave Leah a critical look. Leah stayed stone-faced.

"Why don't we all go out after I finish this batch?" Emily smiled, unsure of something.

"Well Tara and I aren't really doing anything helpful so I thought to show her your prized flowers." Leah countered; they seemed to be having a separate conversation, in a code possibly?

"I'm sure Tara really doesn't want to see my stiff garden." Emily replied.

I was curious to what Leah wanted to talk to me about and didn't want to mess up my chance of friendship with her. "Actually I'm very interested."

Leah gave a smug smile, confident she had won. Emily sighed, folding. "Make sure to show her the roses in the back."

"Of course."

Leah and I walked around the house in silence. Emily really did have a beautiful garden. It wasn't in full bloom because of the time of year but it smelt lovely and it was colourful.

"You like La Push?" Leah inquired, speaking directly to me for the first time. I was momentarily shocked. "Umm, yeah. It's great here. The people are friendly and the landscape is breath taking." I replied.

She laughed and it was bitter. "You sound like you're a real estate agent." I would have made a reply to that as well, but she continued to talk. "Look, I'm not going to beat around the bush. You shouldn't hang around with us. Things here are so...messed up and you don't want to get mixed into it all. You have a chance to go now, before it's too late." and then I heard her whisper lowly what sounded like "I hope." Maybe she was just a jealous ex of Jacob's, he had mentioned something about her.

"Well what's messed up about it?" I asked.

"I...I can't really tell you." She stuttered.

"I thought you weren't beating around the bush." Will someone just please tell me what's going on? I'm not as dumb as I look, something happened and no one will explain what!

Leah looked angry, I mean pissed. "Well some things I...Look, I don't need to even be talking to you right now, so either you take me seriously or you don't." Ohhhh, like in the Old Testaments "Head my warning or face my wrath" Yeah, Leah, I wasn't buying that crap. There was nothing weird about these people except for their size, and maybe Paul's odd behaviour.

"Thanks for the warning but I don't really see the problem." I told her.

"Fine." Leah said in a huff. She walked back into the house quicker that I could have, and went into a back room, away from everyone.

"Your garden is really beautiful Emily." I told her when I came in. She looked distressed, because of Leah I guessed.

"Uh, thank, thanks Tara." She was preoccupied, staring in the direction Leah went. Most likely wondering what she told me. Maybe Emily knew she would say something. And maybe I _should_ take Leah seriously. But something about Leah made me doubt her, her obvious dislike for me? Probably. I had a feeling she wasn't lying though, but it wasn't strong enough a feeling for me to leave.

"I planted the pansies." Kim smiled at me.

"They're really pretty too. I loved them. And the roses were incredible." I had to mention those to Emily because of her comment about Leah showing me them, she was obviously proud of the beautiful roses. When I did her eyes lit and she went off on a long story of how she planted them when she was just little. Her grandmother had told her to put them there, being an ancient symbol of something that I couldn't remember. The afternoon passed this way, each of us telling stories about family, and me with my travels. Neither of them had ever been outside Washington. Leah stayed in the room for the remainder of the day but, honestly, I couldn't care less.. I liked spending the day with them but wished Jacob and the others could have been there too. Emily and Kim told old tribal legends about werewolves and vampires. It was very interesting, hard to believe maybe, but still intriguing.

"But Billy will tell you all about it at the gathering tonight." Kim informed me.

"Well, he'll be telling the whole group really. And you don't have to come with us if you don't want to, Tara, but of course your very welcome." Emily shot Kim a warning look, which did not go unnoticed by me, even though I was sure it was meant to.

"Right." Kim added. "It's great, we have a big fire down on the beach and Billy tells legends- he's a great storyteller. Please come?" Kim asked.

"If I'm allowed," I told them, "Of course I'd love to come." Kim seemed to let out a secret breath she'd been holding and Emily relaxed a little more. They were such nice but odd people.

"Are the others going to be coming?"

"Yes. Lots of us will be there. Seth, Leah's brother, will be the only one missing it. He got grounded for not coming straight home late last week after his friends' party and hasn't been helping out with his share of chores. His mother is at wits end with him." Emily explained about Seth. It seemed like she was making this up as she went along. Then why had he been out with Sam yesterday? I wanted to ask. I didn't want to have another thing to ponder about so I decided to ignore my suspicions for now. And she didn't say Paul wouldn't be coming though but I just assumed that was because it was a given he wouldn't come. After his outburst today he would either be not well enough to go or he would be too embarrassed, I would.

"We'll be eating there around six O'clock. Jacob will meet us as well."

"He's not coming back here first?" I inquired.

"I'm afraid he called when you were outside with Leah. Some business needs to be attended to first, but he will be there." Emily promised. Why were sixteen-year-olds taking care of some 'business'?

"I'll go call my mom and ask her if I can stay." The answer was no at first but I quickly persuaded her it would be good for me to learn about a different culture. Her 'Heck no!' turned into a 'That's a great idea, Sweetie!'

Kim and Emily were delighted I would be staying and we packed up for the evenings supper at the beach. It was a lot of food. Hot dogs, burgers, potato chips. Hundreds of packages of them. And bottles and bottles of pop. I forgot how much boys eat, and then when I remembered their size... How did their mothers and Emily pay for all that food?!

I would enjoy tonight; it would be fun hanging out with them. I decided not to worry about Paul or Leah, or anything else. Just have fun. But then again, maybe someone would finally explain everything to me. About why everyone was acting so weird around me. What I wasn't prepared for was who would tell me and what I would be told.

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	6. Psychotic

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**Okay, so sorry it took so long. My Microsoft Word kept freezing and then deleting everything Id done. I wrote about three separate chapters, all very different and they were all deleted. You can imagine my frustration. It was incredibly infurating and I wanted to break my computer, so I stopped for a while. But here it is now, Word is now running and working without any annoying freezing!!:D**

**Thanks so much to vintage bluejeans, said dance, wishIhadwings, candelifera, witchbeth, and anyone else who may be reading this. I write for you guys!  
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We arrived at First Beach roughly around five thirty to get things ready for the, meeting, would it be called

We arrived at First Beach roughly around five thirty to get things ready for the, meeting, would it be called? Gathering? I helped Emily and Kim set up a table, which the enormous amount of food was put. Leah went for a walk along the beach, not inviting anyone to come, and no one offering to go with her.

I'd never been one for beaches. I didn't like the water, or the salt, or the sand. The salty, sandy water, when it got in your mouth and made you gag. I'd had some bad experiences with the ocean. When I was four we lived briefly in Hawaii while my mother looked around for a new career. She'd taken me to one of their many beautiful beaches, with soft, fine sand and blue/ green water. It was gorgeous. I guess I had wandered off while Heather wasn't paying attention and gone into the water. A huge wave came up and over my head and, even at my small age, I knew it would be the end of my life. The weight of the water dragging me down, I was too weak to fight it. Somehow I had awoken in a strange, white, place, calling out for my mommy. That's the part I remember most clearly. The screaming and crying out in terror. I still awoke from that strange, cold, dream sometimes, but over the years they've lessened more and more. But once every year or so I still wake up drenched in sweat from a nightmare. The strange place was a hospital I was told later. A surfer had seen me wonder off and went after me. He wasn't quite fast enough to stop me but he did save my life. His name was Mark and I still sent him e-mails every now and then. Ever since that day though, water and I haven't gotten along well with water, unless it's a nice, hot bath...

It was nice to sit and listen to the waves and all, but it was also cold, the day now nearing it's end. It wasn't too cold though, being August, and it would get much warmer once the fire got started up. I liked bonfires, and this seemed to be a promising one. Kim explained that because of the salt of the driftwood the fire would turn colours. I'd never seen this done before and looked forward to the sight.

Soon people started showing up. Sam and Billy in one car. Embry and Quil in Embry's black Jeep. Jared came with another boy, I didn't catch his name but he looked slightly younger than the others, not too much, built the same way. Jacob hadn't arrived yet, and he was the one I wanted to talk to most. To ask him what Paul's deal was. If Paul had even told him, that was. I hoped I'd get some info out of one of them but it didn't seem likely.

Soon other elders came, from the committee we'd been to see yesterday, the ones who needed a twenty-one year old to make decisions on who gets to live on their land. Of course they were all very kind, each one greeting me warmly with a nice word and a strong handshake. There weren't many of them but still more than I expected there to be at a beach bonfire party with a bunch of kids. But it was more than that; this was about sharing their culture. All of them sent me glances, much the same as Emily was doing earlier. Concerned faces appraising me for reasons I was unaware.

None of the boys waited for Jacob and to haul into the food straight away. They ate like pigs or, better example, teenage boys. It made me laugh _and_ disgusted me to see Quil shove four hot dogs in his mouth at once. How he did it I wonder to this very day... The others were just as bad, not shoving four hot dogs in their mouth, but eating tons and tons. I wasn't really hungry; Emily kept me well fed at her house. I hadn't meant to eat much there, but everything smelt so good! I now knew why everyone was going on about Emily's brilliant cooking. The guys didn't even wait for the fire to be built, so they were eating everything raw. I was revolted by it. When the fire _did_ finally get going I was not disappointed. Blues and greens, it looked almost fake, and very majestic. Like something you'd see in a movie or something with special effects. I sat down on a log and watched, entranced. I didn't look away for a long time, until I felt someone beside me. Jacob.

"Pretty, isn't it?" He asked, leaning down next to me.

"Very. I like this better than normal coloured fires." I replied with a grin, still staring into the flames. It couldn't be good for the eyes.

"Have you ever seen this done before?"

"No."

Jacob was quiet for a good long, time. I almost forgot he was there but I could still hear his light breathing. He picked up a stick and put one end in the fire and began to play with the flames. Was he a pyromaniac? It burned down to his fingers and he dropped the remaining stub in the fire pit, sighing deeply.

"My friend wants to talk to you," Jacob began. "If you could be open minded it would help..." he finished.

"Oh, uhm...who?" I began to get worried, tearing my eyes away from the beautiful blue fire for the first time.

"Paul. I think he wants to apologize for...earlier. He's worried he might have scared you."

"Oh." Was my only reply. Paul had come? Paul had come.

"So... will you be open minded?" Jacob asked.

"Okay." I was hesitant but willing enough to hear his apology. "Where is he?"

"Having words with Sam. They are a little ways down the beach, talking privately. Were going to meet them now." It sounded like more of a command that I had to obey than anything else. This Jacob scared me, he wasn't the same as the Jacob I'd met yesterday, or the Jacob that I talked to earlier today in his car. This Jacob was almost professional, I couldn't understand why, it made me think of the way Sam acted. Too serious. It was safe to assume that I didn't like this Jacob. I got up and walked with him anyway, deciding that I might as well get it over with and get back to the warm fire side.

Sam and Paul weren't that far down the beach, only away from the noise. We could still see the glowing fire and the faint outlines of people from where we stood. Sam looked at me with odd approval in his eyes. And then to Jacob with the same, yet oddly different, approval in his eyes. Gah! I hated these eye messages!! Didn't anyone speak out loud anymore?

I looked at Paul. His eyes were downcast and he fidgeted with his hands, I thought he'd actually pull out his fingers. A disturbing thought. I forced my eyes back to Jacob. He was still having eye conversations with Sam. I cleared my throat loudly, letting them know I was also there, and Jacob broke into a brilliant grin. Sam stayed stone faced, unimpressed, of course. Jacob had to fight back the smile I knew was twitching at the corners of his mouth.

"Jacob," Sam said, "We need to discuss something in private." Jacob's eyebrows arched and Sam turned to walk. Jake gave me a quick grin and walked over to Paul. He punched his arm playfully. Paul lifted his head to look at Jacob. He looked... Scared? Why would a guy that was that perfect looking, strong looking, get scared? Jacob followed after Sam, kicking up the sand as he went.

Paul was quiet for a long time. When was the apology coming? Was there an apology, or did Jacob just want me to be awkward? Was the entire La Push community waiting behind the bush a few meters away, waiting to jump out and yell "Surprise! We've been playing with your mind since you've gotten here! It's been fun- Leave now!!"

"Uh," I broke the unpleasant silence "Jacob said you wanted to, um, talk." I said it as if I was posing a question, hoping that way he'd at least say something in reply.

His head shot up at my voice. There was fire in his dark eyes, a fire of something other than anger. I wasn't sure what it was but it was slightly different than earlier that day. I felt my cheeks go hot under his gaze and I stared down at my feet. I still felt his eyes burning a hole through me so I glanced up again.

"I'm sorry about earlier. Really, it wasn't your fault. And I didn't mean what I said. I just really didn't want to hurt you. Not that I would, but I have to be careful. Sometimes I have a really vicious temper." Paul spoke fast, and it was hard to tell what he was saying. He didn't want to hurt me? He wouldn't? Did he think he would? Why would he think he would?

"You thought you would hurt me?" I waited for the people in the bushes to start to giggle. It was silent except for Paul's deep sigh.

"There's no way I could ever hurt you Tara, believe me. The pack would never allow me. I would never allow me. I'd rather die than hurt you." His eyes got wide and innocent, like he was vowing never to hurt me, vowing himself to me in a way I didn't understand. I believed him, even though I hadn't a clue why he was telling me this. I wanted to lean forward and hug him, embrace him, but I was too dazed and confused.

"Pack?" I asked, breaking away from the idea of hugging this complete stranger who yelled at me earlier. What was wrong with him? Seriously, someone tell me.

"Oh, uh, uhm, yeah?" He looked concerned with my reaction. My reaction being I thought he belonged in a mental institution, if you can picture that on my face.

"What the hell are you talking about?" I asked, getting angry now. Frustrated. Jacob had left me alone with a mental, maybe even slightly psychotic, person.

"I'm a werewolf."

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**Ohhhhhhhhh. What?! Yes. So the next chapter will be told in Pauls P.O.V at the beginning, Ive decided. Hope you liked this one X)**

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	7. Stay

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**Paul's P.O.V.**

Damn it Paul, why did you say that?! You just had to blurt it out like that, right? No, calm. Calm.

Tara's face went white. I thought she might pass out so I stepped toward her, she stepped back from me wearily.

"Werewolf?" She repeated what I said.

"I know it seems impossible but-" I was cut off.

"Impossible? Yeah, well, this isn't funny. Seriously, it's sick. You and your little friends are messed up!" She did something I hadn't expected. Tara walked toward a bush a few feet away from where she was standing and kicked it, yelling, "You can all come out now!" I thought I would seem pretty mental, telling her I was a werewolf like that, but her... It didn't matter though. She was...Her. Mine. The one I was meant to be with. She was perfect; even if she was slightly deranged.

"What are you doing?" I asked softly, hoping not to set her off even more. I guess I had a lot of experience with people who are pissed off, taking notes from the others on their methods on how to calm _me_ down.

"What are you doing?" She countered, looking up at me now.

I took a deep breath, this was going to be difficult. She thought we were playing a prank on her. "I understand this is hard to comprehend but please listen to me. Please?" I gave a pleading look. She had to believe me, if she didn't... I wouldn't let my thoughts go there though.

"Werewolf? You think that if you tell me you're a werewolf- a mythical being- I will _believe_ you? I will _understand_?" Her eyes were clouded and it hurt me to look at her this way. Tara's cheeks were red in embarrassment, as if she really was having a stupid prank played on her. Little did she know how real this was. Maybe it would even be better if it was a prank, better for her anyway.

"I didn't say you _would_ understand, I just asked you to try. I'm going to sound like a total jackass here and all I want you to keep in mind is 'what if'. Does that really sound so difficult?" Yeah I was madly in love with her, I'd die for her, but I still wasn't perfect with controlling my temper. Some coldness had just slipped.

"Okay, what if?" Tara crossed her arms and I gave a small, slightly triumphant, smile. She was at least playing along for now.

I took a deep breath. I had to word this right or she'd walk away and I couldn't guarantee she would come back. "Okay, so you know when earlier I flipped out on you, told you to stay away from me?"

Her teeth clenched slightly. "Yes."

"Well, I just didn't want to hurt you. I thought I might phase, turn into a werewolf. Then and there. It happens when we get angry or are near cold ones. Mostly though we don't have one without the other."

"Cold ones?" Tara asked sceptically.

"Uhh, yeah. We call them cold ones because they don't have souls. They feed off our people so we have to kill them as the protectors of La Push. You, I guess, would call them vampires. Damn bloodsuckers!" I let go of a slight snarl at the thought but then returned my gaze to Tara's perfect face and I was instantly calmed.

"Vampires? Right, now there are vampires in this ridiculous story. Vampires and werewolves." She gave me almost a dirty look and said, "Continue." But I couldn't continue, just looking at her made me speechless, which almost never happened with me. I always had two cents about something. But now, I couldn't concentrate on anything less than her features, her flawlessness. Her deep, thoughtful eyes, straight nose, thick, dark hair pulled up in the back of her head, strands of it loose around her face. She was

sent from heaven. Her lips were full but they were now in a slight pout which made her more attractive.

"So why were you angry at me? As far as I'm aware, last time I checked anyway, I'm not a vampire."

"No." I looked to the ground, not knowing how to say it. How to word it right? Did it matter, really? If she was going to believe me she was going to believe me, nothing I could say would change that, would it? Should I just tell her the way I told her I was a werewolf by just plain stating it? It had worked so far; she was still here.

"I wasn't mad at you. Well, maybe I was, a little bit. Mostly I was mad at myself."

"Why?" She was becoming greatly frustrated now and I hated that it was me making her this way.

"Because I'm in love with you! Okay? And it's more than that. You're my imprint!" I ran my fingers through my hair, thinking on what to say next. I didn't look at Tara's face as I spoke for fear I would again be at a loss for words. "You have no idea how much I could hurt you and how much I want to be with you, how much I need you." I shook my head, throwing up my arms. "I know! I know nothing makes any sense. Nothing makes any sense. To you I look like a total ass hole who escaped from an insane

asylum, right? I wish that were it. I wish I could explain it to you better but all I can say is that your my imprint. I want you and your my imprint. That's it. That's all I'm sure of at this moment. I need you. Damn it! Damn it, damn it, damn it!" Finally I looked at her, her face showed shock and concern, though I noted the frustration and anger was gone. I was overcome by emotions I had never felt. I couldn't identify them or place them and it didn't matter to me. They could stay there and I wouldn't ask what they were, they were strangely nice. Intense.

It only took me a few strides with my long legs to get to her and I took her wrists, gently, so that I wouldn't hurt her.

"I just don't want you to think I'm a liar. To leave, to hate me. I don't want to never see you again. I want to be with you. I want you to want me the way I want you. The way I feel about you. God, it's so confusing!" I looked more deeply into her dark eyes. They were swimming with thoughts I was unable to read. She masked well what she was thinking. I looked down, speaking again. It was going to be infuriating talking to her if I couldn't even at her.

"I was angry today because it would be so easy for me to hurt you if I got mad. It kills me to know that no matter how much I want to be with you that I want you to have the choice. I don't want you to be afraid of me. I would give my life for you in a second if there was something that threatened you and I wont let myself be that threat. I know this is all hard to understand, to believe. It's insane." I shook my head again, trying to comprehend what I was saying if I was in her shoes.

Then she did something I wasn't expecting. I felt her pull her hands from my grip. They softly touched my cheeks and firmly tilted my head so that I was staring into those swarming, thoughtful eyes that I would happily get lost in. A small smile slipped across my imprint's face. "I believe you." She whispered,

I thought I would burst from happiness. Not burst into a giant wolf, but I thought my skin might shatter into a thousand little bits and pieces. I felt my lips tug into a huge smile, this was the greatest I'd ever felt. Nothing bothered me now, I didn't worry about hurting her, I knew that Jake was right, I never could. She had accepted me. Believed me.

Tara smiled brighter back at me and I pulled her close to me. She wrapped her tiny arms around me, a bit timidly at first and then she eased up, became at easy I guess. I kept my body protectively in front of her. I was a wall blocking out any harm that could come. Nothing would ever hurt her now. I moved my head down and placed my lips gently on the top of her head. Her hair was soft and smelt good.

"So what does this mean?" Tara's voice came quietly to my ears.

I pulled back away from her, keeping my hand locked in hers. She didn't object to this and I noticed she held tighter than I did, as if she hoped I wouldn't let go. Maybe that was only wishful thinking, but then, maybe it wasn't.

"What does what mean?" There were many questions that could be answered by posing that question.

"That I'm your imprint. What is that?"

I gave a slight smile. "It means that I'll only ever see you. When I'm in a room of crowded people, or alone in solitary, I'll only see you. It will only ever be you. You are the world, the sun, the stars. You are my everything. If there was ever a harm I would save you from it. Were soul mates."

"So I don't have a choice then?" I almost lost it then but I was too shocked.

"You, erg, hhh" I made some grunting noises out of pain and confusion.

"That's not what I meant." She moved closer and gently caressed the side of my face. "I meant that this was already done. You didn't choose for it to happen, it was just me?"

I was relieved and my body relaxed. "No one got a choice. I just saw you and something just went off inside of me. I don't know what it was. The emotions were so intense and I was just drawn to you."

"Does this mean I'm a werewolf too?" She asked. I gave a little laugh and stroked her face now.

"No. It just means that you have a werewolf who will always be in love with you. Billy will explain the specifics of these things tonight. How it all started, our legends and stories and whatnot. I'm not really that much of a storyteller."

"Is that what everything was about today? The meeting and the gathering tonight?"

"Yeah. They were worried about me. I have the worst temper out of the entire pack." She gave a little smile and interrupted saying, "That sounds so odd." I replied with saying, "Get used to odd."

"Why is your temper the worst?"

"Umm, well, wouldn't you be somewhat angry if you became a teenage werewolf?" I dismissed it easily.

"The others aren't too bad though. Why are you worse than them?"

"Just bitter I guess." I didn't want to think about my poor ass excuse for a father right now. I was too happy to let him ruin this.

"What do I have to do?" She looked anxious, happily though, and it made me laugh.

"Absolutely nothing. Stay the same. Let me get to know you. I have questions for you, you know."

"Well so do I. You expect to just win me over because you profess your undying love for me?" She smiled, trying to be seductive, which made me laugh loud and booming.

"I think they're starting now." Tara pointed to the group who had just gathered as a family around the glowing blue/green fire.

I leaned down and whispered in her ear, "You'll stay?" I asked trying to hide my hopefulness.

A different smile lit up her perfect face. "I'll stay." She said. Then she added something strange. "I think I'm finally beginning to understand these secret messages."

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	8. The Truth

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I tried not to shake. I tried to control my trembling stature as we made our way back to the bonfire everyone was sitting around. The guy standing next to me, tall and strong, was grinning (I had to admit that he was quite beautiful, even if, he terrified me). He was absolutely mental. Going on about how he was a werewolf, and he was drastically in love with me, he'd die for me. This wasn't a joke anymore; the look in his eyes told me that. Told me he actually believed in mythical creatures, he believed he was one of them. What scared me the most wasn't his huge exterior, or the things he said to me, though they were factors. What scared me the most was that he really, honestly believed this, and thought I did too. He truly, deep down believed he needed me.

My anger dissolved almost instantly when I saw the waves of emotion floating around in his big pools of dark brown eyes. It melted me, and also terrified me. From that moment on I had to play along. I had to help him. That was all I needed to do. I felt that he needed a serious medical evaluation and I would stay with his to get him that help. I would stay behind him, help in anyway possible. Even if that meant for the time being to play along, I'd always been a good actress.

I had to get to Jacob, to talk to him. Jake could help me. This was all a misunderstanding. He'd tell me Paul had a condition. I wasn't the type of girl perfect, beautiful, boys confessed their undying, passionate love to, so Paul must have a condition. No matter how much it scared me, I had to admit to myself that I was strangely attracted to him. That really freaked me out. If he wasn't insane, it might actually have worked out, but then again, if he wasn't insane, he wouldn't be confessing his love to me. There was something messed up about my ways of thinking. Why was I even thinking about him like that? There must be something wrong with me. Maybe I was the one who needed psychiatric help. But when he looked at me, and I stared into those pools… I don't know! I felt like we could see into each others souls. God, how corny does that sound? Well I already sound mental too, so I'll try to explain it.

It was like, when, when I looked into his gorgeous eyes, they stopped everything else around us. Nothing else but both our thoughts, our feelings, circulated, pulsing into each others bodies. Everything he felt rushed into my body. I got caught up in the moment, wanting nothing but to hold him. And I didn't even care.

Now I was back in my right mind, okay, not completely my right mind, but I wasn't fanatisicing about a boy who thought he was a werewolf, which was good enough for me. Thoughts swarmed into my mind like, what was I going to say to Jacob? Did he know what Paul thought he was? If he did was it safe for me to be alone with him? If it wasn't then why had he let me? Why did I want to be alone with him? That wasn't a question I'd ask Jake, but this one was. What was going on?

I tried to keep a hold on my emotions standing next to Paul, if I started to tremble, he'd know something was wrong. His arm was around my waist, warm, as warm as I had been sitting next to the fire, it was nice. Maybe I was exaggerating, but he was really hot. Not just handsome hot, but burning my waist hot. My imagination, I was just cold, I told myself.

All eyes were on me as we returned. Emily was sitting next to Kim, who was in Jared's arms. They smiled their secret smiles warmly, accepting something I didn't understand. Sam stood protectively behind Emily with his arms on her shoulders, his face approving, an odd look for Sam, I figured he didn't use it often.

Everyone else had smiling faces, staring at us. The copper faces glowed in the firelight. Leah had returned from her walk, and she stared at me with a scornful look, mad I didn't take her advice and leave I bet. The elders all smiled with their thin lips, none brighter that Billy Black. I wondered why Paul's love life impacted their lives so much, I mean, wasn't it normal to put your arm someone? It's just a friendly gesture. The boys all grinned at each other, someone had probably made a joke, I guessed.

I saved Jacobs face for last. He seemed to be the only one not smiling, besides Leah I mean. He watched me somewhat carefully, trying to read my expression.

"Can I speak with you?" I asked him. There was an intake of breath around the group, and the atmosphere went tense.

Jacob seemed to be expecting it but he answered wearily. "Yeah, sure." He short a glance at Sam, more secret messages. You have no idea how annoying it was not understanding them. Almost obediently Sam walked over to Paul.

Jacob and I walked a short distance away from the group, and I didn't look back at them. I heard their whispers and small conversations start again but the breath was not released yet.

"Were suppost to be starting soon so make it quick." He said lowly to me.

"I just want some things cleared up." I told him. "What's up with Paul? Did you know he'd tell me about...urhm... did you know what he'd say?" I asked.

"What'd he say?" Jacob was looking at my face but wouldn't meet my eyes.

"He thinks he's a werewolf, Jacob." I stated plainly. That is what I was told by Paul, just shortened.

"He doesn't think," Jacob mumbled. "Tara, he _is_ a werewolf."

That wasn't funny of him, I lost it. "That's mental Jacob! Absolutely psychotic! You don't actually believe him do you? The poor boy needs help!" I felt like defending Paul from his unsupported friend who obviously didn't care. Or maybe Jacob was insane too.

"He's not mental and I'm not either. No matter how it seems, that's the way it is. The truth."

Now I was frustrated and bewildered and on the verge of tears. "The truth!" I cried out in in my frustration, throwing up my arms.

"Keep your voice down!" Jacob hissed. "If Paul finds your in any kind of distress-" I cut Jacob off.

"Well, actually Jacob," My voice was bitter and hurt and confused. "I AM in distress. Some guy I just met professed his love for me today, and he thinks he's a werewolf! Says he 'imprinted' on me, whatever the hell that means! Love but stronger? Well I don't even know if there is such a thing as love, so that's bull in my eyes. And now you're trying o get me to believe in some mythical world of werewolves and vampires? It's so stupid! So you can see I'm a little distressed, Jacob. Whatever you're trying to pull on me it wont work because I'm leaving now. They're just stories, get over it! And tell your sick friend to get some help!" It all came out in a jumble and I knew everyone around the fire had heard every word that was said. It was quiet, no one moved, no one spoke. Even the waves seemed to stand still. The silence was eerie.

The quiet seemed to last a lifetime as nothing happened, but it was only a second and happened very quickly. There was a loud cry of pain and agony. It was ear splitting, gut wrenching, and broke my heart. I looked over to see Paul, his eyes clenched shut, his large hands in fists, he was shaking all over, like earlier, but more violently now.

Then there was a loud popping sound, like a firecracker going off and Paul was in the air. I saw it all. Paul bursted into a giant animal- wolf, fur and all. When he landed, I don't even think his paws (PAWS!!) were even toughing the ground before he started running. The howls of his pain echoed through me and I felt his pain, like I had earlier when I had assured him I believed him. But then I felt relief and... love. Oh my god, he was telling the truth! The wolf-boy tore off down the beach and disappeared, all was remaining was a sneaker that had been thrown, shards of clothing, and the distant cries of Paul The Wolf.

There was no doubt in my mind now that he and Jacob had been telling the truth, though I still couldn't believe the scene I'd just saw. I had proof in front of me, I'd SEEN the truth and still, my mind was telling me it wasn't real. The aching in my chest for Paul The Wolf though over powered it and I collapsed on the rough sand. The sad, heartbreaking whimpers of a wolf were the last things I remember hearing before everything turned black.

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	9. My Choice

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A part of me didn't want to wake up. I wanted to plunge deeper and deeper into the dark abyss that was now becoming my life. I thought I might die, and I would welcome it. But then I thought of my brother and my mom and Clark. How would they manage without me? Did they know where I was? How could they when I didn't even know where I was? I wasn't home, that was certain. I couldn't be dying though, there was no light. Wasn't there suppost to be a light for me to run towards if I was dying? And then I smelt something like burnt toast. Had I had a seizure? God, wouldn't that have been a sight? Lying in front of a bunch of our new neighbours from La Push going into convulsions, my stomach did a flip. I felt myself becoming conscious, but not yet lucid. I vaguely heard voices surrounding me, or was it only one? Soft murmurs were all I made out. I tried to put together what someone was saying. Nothing. Where was I? A thought jumped into my head. What if I had dreamed this whole La Push experience? Maybe it was all a very bad dream. I believed in dreams. But then I knew this couldn't be a dream. Even I couldn't have come up with such a thing, Paul the Wolf, in my sleep. I wasn't that creative, even in my subconscious.

A wave of sorrow fell upon me as I remembered the whimpers of a wolf in pain. Paul. My heart lurched. Oh god, what had I done to him? I told him I believed him, I lied. I lied to a boy who actually, possibly, was my other half. I had never believed in true love or that crap, no one ever stayed in love for long. Sure, people were full of hormones and get caught up in a moment, but they were too easily to jump to conclusions that they actually wanted to stay with that person. And no one would ever want me. But hey, wasn't anything possible now? If there were such things as werewolves, and possibly vampires, why couldn't somebody, no less a mythical creature, love me? That was more plausible than an actual human boy, right?

God, this sounded so insane! Did I really believe it? The answer was yes. I didn't want it to be yes. I wanted to be dreaming, or maybe drunk, maybe I'd turned to drugs six months ago and was living in some messed up fantasy world. But I had seen it. I had watched Paul explode into this wolf being. I had heard him. I had heard the painful cries, no matter how much I tried to drown them out, I still heard them echoing. It was torture. I finally threw my eyes open, silently hoping I would be in a mental institution, then I wouldn't be crazy thinking I was insane, I would be. But I was surprised to find myself in a very tiny, yet cosy, little room, lying on a sofa with a blanket pulled over me. The T.V. was on a sports station but there was no sound coming from it so I supposed it had been muted. I tried to get up without much success, by body was drained. I hadn't even been running, or doing any physical activity, had I? I guess learning there were such things as actual teenaged werewolves took a lot out of you. That sounded ridiculous! God!

I tried to stand again, giving it all I had and managed to start walking on wobbly legs toward the door. I didn't know where I'd go once I got there but it was better than being here, alone (as far as I knew of), in a strange house.

"Hey!" I heard from behind me. I turned around to see Quil staring at me with an unsure expression on his face. "Jake? You better get out here." he looked quickly behind his shoulder and back at me. "Quick!" He added.

Embry come in from the door I was about to leave from and almost bumped into me. "Looks like we've got an escapee." He grinned but his eyes were scared.

"Shit, Tara!" I heard Jacobs voice coming from behind me. "If Paul sees this he'll kill me! Back on the coach." He moved closer to me and I was guided back to the ugly green and orange patterned coach.

"Stay." He put up his hands and sighed, looking over me concerned.

"Where am I?" My voice was hoarse and sounded too forced; it hurt to speak.

"You're at my house." Jake said, his voice level as if waiting for me to pass out again.

"Did I have a seizure?" I asked, avoiding his eyes.

"What? Why, do you have a history of that?"

"Oh, no, it's just that I smell... burnt toast. Is that normal?"

"Oh," Jacob grinned like a child, he must have made a cute kid. "Yeah, well, I attempted to make a grilled cheese. You were stirring and I knew you'd be awake soon so I assumed you'd be hungry." That was sweet of him. I could feel my stomach growl at the mention of food but I wasn't the mood to eat, not at all.

"And you burned it?" I asked, attempting to smile back, though I was scarcely in the mood and it much have showed on my face because Jake grimaced.

"Yeah, I'm no master cook. I stink. Now please don't try and run out on me, 'cause none of us want to face Paul's wrath when he comes back if you're not here. I don't think you'd like it that much either."

"He..." My voice trailed off but then I cleared my throat and it came out slightly stronger. "He came back?"

"Hell yeah!" Quil said enthusiastically.

"You went down and he was there so fast! God, that speed, I wish I could get to that level! Only Jake's gotten-" Embry was cut off by Jacob.

"Embry, I really don't think she needs anymore... information," he decided on that word. "Thrust upon her at this moment of time." There was a look in his eyes that commanded silence; it was deadly. I had to look away.

"Is he... mad?" I asked, afraid of what the answer might be so I added an alternate question. "Why did he come back?"

"Paul likes to get what he wants. He's quite stubborn when he wants something bad." Jacob answered, looking directly into my eyes.

"And... he really wants me then?"

"Never been more stubborn about anything in his life." Quil said matter-of-factly.

I laughed; this reaction took them all by surprise. "Me? That's ludicrous!"

Jake laughed. "If only you knew."

"So, where is he?" My voice wasn't more than a whisper.

"Umm, he went to talk to Sam about some things, control mostly." Jacob started to fidget and avoided my eyes again when he spoke. "Tara, he could really hurt you and no one wants to see that happen. You can still walk away if that's what you want." Who knew what I wanted? I certainly had no idea what I wanted.

I ignored the question. "Who else know about Paul? Did the people at the beach find out when I did?"

"No. They were all aware."

I closed my eyes, leaning back on the well worn sofa. "This doesn't make any sense."

"Do you want to go back to sleep?" Embry's voice was thick and deep.

"Embry?" I didn't open my eyes to look at him.

"Yeah?"

"Have you ever tried singing?" I asked.

Quil burst into a booming laugh and Jacob joined him. I finally looked at them. Quil and Jake were leaning on each other for support they were laughing so hard. Embry was bright red/

"Why?" He asked.

"I don't know, your voice is soothing. It was a serious question." I shot Jacob and Quil a piercing glance but that just made them laugh harder.

"No... well, once for an assembly with these two jerks, but nothing else."

"Yeah," Quil added. "They booed us offstage and that put an end to Embry's dreams of becoming a singer."'

"That's sad. I wouldn't have given up if I were you." I slowly closed my eyes again.

The room fell silent but I think that was because I drifted off to sleep again. No dreams came, but I had the feeling of... being asleep, if there is such a sense.

I awoke later on to the sound of muffled voices. Now I was coherent enough to make out the conversation.

"You should have come and got me right away!" An angry voice said.

"She wasn't in her right mind, okay? She needed sleep, trust me, I think I know about these things a little bit better than you do." Jacob?

"Now you sound like Sam!" the other voice said. "She's my imprint I think I know what's best for her!" That sent shivers up and down my spine. Paul was here. In the room with me. Oh my…..

"Obviously she did need the sleep; she's slept for sixteen hours straight." Was it that long? Was that even healthy? I dint think so. I've never slept so long in my entire life; I rarely had time for sleep. Someone in my family had to do the worrying.

"Well I would have like to be informed right away next time she wakes up. I don't want to have to hear it from Quil teasing Embry about his singing career." I thought I detected a quiet smile but then his voice went serious. "I have to be here. I have to be there for her. I want to answer the questions for her, myself."

"Maybe we should play this off as a dream, there's still time. Or maybe we could-"

"Jacob, if she wants to leave, she's free to go, but I'm giving this all I've got, okay? Respect that." Paul's voice was final and I opened my eyes to stare at them. Jacob noticed right away and just stared at me. Paul finally got the message and looked over to me as well. I probably looked like crap. Stress did that to me, not that I was attractive anyway. Immediately Paul's eyes softened when they met mine, full of adoration. I had to look away, ashamed, afraid.

"Jake." I whispered; avoiding Paul's searching eyes that burned holes into me.

Jacob started to move towards me but Paul stopped him.

"I want a minute." He said.

"Paul…" Jacob started.

"No. Go."

Jacob walked slowly from the room and I sent him a pleading glance. I didn't want him to leave me alone. I didn't worry about Paul hurting me, I was mad at myself for deceiving him. I had caused him pain and I was royally disgusted, royally pissed, at myself. Jacob hesitated but decided he didn't want to face Paul later if he didn't obeyed.

Paul walked toward me swiftly, crouching down beside me. I still wouldn't look at him.

"Tara," he whispered. That sent more chills up and down my body. I wanted to reach out and hug him, to tell him how sorry I was. To pour my heart out to someone who would listen because I knew he would.

I grimaced away from him but he seemed to ignore it.

"I don't want you to be afraid of me." I wanted to tell him I wasn't, a dirty lie I knew, but I didn't want him to know it.

"Please look at me?" With much force I managed to turn my face far enough to look into Paul's glowing brown eyes. It cut into my chest, the pure sense of love, and after I had been so awful, telling him in front of everyone to go to hell. I hated myself. He moved to put his hand over mine, which were ripping each other apart, though I hadn't even noticed. They were numb but I felt Paul's warmth and shuttered away knowing why he was so warm, being a wolf I supposed it came naturally to be so hot, like a dog. they were always warm. He pulled away from me and I looked away again.

"Are you going to talk to me?" He asked softly. I shook my head 'no' in response.

"Please?" he reached out to touch my face and I pulled back.

"Don't touch me!" I screamed and slapped his face. It didn't hurt because I still couldn't feel my fingers that were asleep, but I knew it would have hurt if I could feel my hands. I wasn't sure why I had done this. I just didn't want to hurt him. Not physical pain, I knew that I couldn't really ever do that, he was too big and strong, and a wolf... but I didn't want to ever cause him emotional pain. I knew I would never be able to care for him the way I saw he loved me the way I could tell he did in his deep, beautiful dark eyes. I could never return that look of everlasting adoration and so I didn't want him to get any closer to me, to cause him more pain. It would be harder for him that way. I didn't want to feel responsible for more of his pain, so it would be better if he stopped wanting me now, if I stopped seeing him, stop coming to La Push all together. I could convince Mom this wasn't a good place to live in. Oh, god, did she know I was with Jacob? I really hope she did. I hope they weren't worrying about me. I would feel even more guilty about things. For convincing her to let me go yesterday. I didn't want anyone to be hurt on my expense, I didn't want to have to carry that load on my shoulders on top of everything else. Was that selfish? Am I such a bad person?

"Damn it Tara!" Paul stood up and kicked over the coffee table that was about two feet away from the coach. It made a loud crashing sound and I jumped back at the noise. "I don't want you to be afraid of me! I mean," he rubbed his brown hair back from his forehead, a wisp had come across his face. I didn't think he usually went without frequent haircuts, he didn't seem the type.

"It's too late! I may be a monster, but there's really nothing I can do about that, so can't you at least try not to be repulsed long enough for me to explain what I am to you?! What you are to me?! More than I did yesterday because obviously that worked out well, huh?"

I winced at the remembrance of Paul the Wolf jumping into the air, the cries of pain...

"I don't really care what the hell you do with your life, that's your choice, but I'm making mine. My choice is that I'm going to do whatever's in my power to have you. I'm going to be completely honest with you, I'm no liar, and I have the worst temper of anyone you'd ever meet! I'm not Mr. Handsome, Mr. Perfect, or Mr. Whatever- The-Hell you'd want in a man, okay? I can be the biggest freak in the world, if that's what you want to call me, but I'm not fake. You can't call me fake. I want you." His eyes were full of fire. He was trembling and I was pacing myself for a giant wolf to pop out.

"So whether you like it or not I'm going to be there fighting for you, whatever it takes to get you not to be afraid of me. Until I'm cold and dead, buried in the ground I will always be there waiting for you, protecting you, loving you. I'm completely stubborn and I want you. I'm not giving up on you so easy like you think I will. Nothing else but you is on my list of priorities. That's my choice, and I want to know yours."

I waited a few moments to answer. I didn't know exactly what to say. I didn't know what I wanted. "I don't know." I finally whispered.

Paul sighed. "I didn't mean for you to choose right now, Tara. When you're ready to make the choice I'll know. But before you do I want to have a chance to try to win you over, get my side of things cleared up, you know? I bet you have lots of questions." It was a statement, not a question.

"You shouldn't try." I said grouchily.

"Yeah, well, that's too bad. That's my choice again, isn't it?" He leaned closer and I grimaced again but now he just grinned and whispered in my ear. "I'm not giving up on you, Tara." His nose brushed against my cheek and I felt my cheeks burn, my heart thumped, but it didn't feel wrong. Even if Paul was a wolf, he seemed to be a perfectly human young man, when he was in this form anyway. He chuckled at my response, pleased with himself, obviously.

"What the hell did you do?!" Jacob shocked and angry expression found us. "Billy's gonna flip and blame me for this! Damn it Paul, I'm going to kill you!"

Paul laughed. "See you Tara, think about our little talk." He paused at the door and turned to me. "And don't think I won't be back." He smiled warmly at me, lovingly, different from the grin. I wanted to smile back but I kept my face cold and I heard him laughing on his way down the road.

Jacob sighed and sat down on the end of the coach, careful not to squish my toes. "Oh, well. Want something to eat?"

"Can I make it?" I asked, wanting to do something to take my mind off of Paul.

"Sure, I think that's safer, if you're feeling up to it." I nodded that I was.

"Umm, Jake?" I asked. "What did you tell my parents?" that question was burning my insides but Jacob laughed.

"I'll tell you while you're cooking, okay?"

"Deal."

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	10. Explainations and Haughty

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**Soo, the first part of this story was pretty boring to write I have to admit. thats why it took so long to post, plus it's exam week at school. blah! Anyway here it is finally, chapter 10!! I cant believe I even written this much O it's insanity, but it's fun :)**

**Thanks to 'clears throat' : PinkSlytherin, HelloSexy, twilight1650, vintage bluejeans, Bible Chick, Superdani, Auphora66, JadisSnape, PaulTara4ever , verityanthony4ever, said dance, ForeverMyOwn, witchbeth, wishIhadwings , bingo1000, awesomeness.iam, my friend Lindsey, anyone at all who might be reading this, **

**and a very special thanks to Aeieo, who messaged me to tell me to get my butt into gear :P aha, thanks!! you are _all_ totally awesome!!**

**I edited this chapter, it's basically the same, just revised a bit more, after finding a few things that made no sense. I'm not saying you wont find more, but I hope it's okay now.**

**And DISCLAIMER, I do not own Twilight!! (I really have to start putting more of these up!!)**

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Good grief.

I wasn't really one for using character sayings, except when I would make fun of something calling it 'totally boss'. But I felt like saying it. Good grief, what was my life becoming? As Jacob helped me hobble out into his kitchen he explained to me that he had called my parents, getting Kim to impersonate me, I of course hadn't though Kim sounded a thing like me, her voice was soft and light, mine was somewhat similar but the tone was different, a tad bit deeper. They had used my cell phone though so my mom, if they could even tell, had just assumed that it was bad reception to why my voice sounded so odd. They asked if I would possibly be able to spend the night at Kim's house. At first, Jake said, they (Heather), was reluctant then they used the begging technique, of which every teenager argued with. I was sure Kim must not have been unfamiliar with it because she pulled it off.

"But you said I'd been sleeping for over 16 hours Jacob, and however long before that, so why haven't my parents come to get me yet?"

"They did, you were at Emily and Sam's for a while, playing it off as Kim's place, and they came to get you but you were asleep. They didn't want to wake you. They had a nice conversation with Kim's 'parents'-" he used air quotations with one hand as the other held on to my waist effortlessly, balancing me. It would have been easier if he had just carried me, but I supposed walking would be good for me now. "-though. Played flawlessly by Leah and Seth's mom, and Quil's grandpa, Old Quil. Even though they were somewhat suspicious at the sight. He's ancient..." Jacob laughed, reading my face, "Your mom was polite enough not to say anything, don't worry."

"That still doesn't answer the question, Jacob." I told him as I was seated at the kitchen table. Jake pulled out a chair for himself.

"I know. It was suggested by Billy, who just happened to be by visiting," Jacob gave me a grin, "That you should be able to stay with friends until you're fully moved into your new house."

"They found one then?"

"A house? Yeah, it's nice. Big. Needs a bit of a paint job but that won't take long."

"Did they say...when?" I asked slowly. I needed to know how much longer I would be without my family. I was awake now, and aware enough of my self and surroundings enough that I could carry out a conversation with them. It was hard to believe they didn't figure out something was up. Not Clark, he was dense, but Heather was more... intelligent? No, suspicious. Heather was more suspicious than to think I was actually just sleeping, and she'd never allow me to just stay with friends I'd just met. At least, I don't think she would. I had never really had friends so quickly or that I wanted to really spend any time with.

"Sometime tomorrow is when they called the movers for I think. That's what they told Billy anyway. You should be back in your own bed by tomorrow night." I smiled warmly at the thought. My own bed, it had been three weeks since I had last slept on my mattress. Always hotel beds. Those are fine for vacations, but not to live on. They became uncomfortable after a while. I missed my warm covers, pillows, and down filled mattress. It was like just like what I imagined paradise to be like at the moment.

"Do you want to make something to eat now?" Jacob looked at me, no longer smiling, but his face wasn't unkind. I nodded that I did and he got up to help me over to the counter. At this specific moment of time I didn't care what I ate; my stomach just needed food. It was screaming to me 'FEEEEEED MEEEEEE' well, that's a bit of melodramatic, but I think you get it. I was hungry.

I opened the fridge and found some wrapped meat, the label read 'turkey' and I laid it on the counter. Then I made my way hobbling over to the bread box about three feet away, pulling out some multigrain. I was impressed they would buy this, considering that all that was in their fridge was a bunch of fish that looked like they had caught themselves, about a thousand packages of hotdogs, and pop. Also a few sticks of pepperoni and the turkey I was lucky enough to find.

I started to put the turkey on the bread and looked up at Jacob, who was watching me like a hawk, with a fierce look in his eye. But it wasn't me he was _really_ looking at; it was the food I was working with.

"Umm, Jake?" I asked him cautiously, stopping what I was doing and he seemed to snap out of his weird trance and look at me, pulling his eyes away.

"Yeah?"

"Do... you want one?" he was practically salivating. Jake nodded and I tried to suppress a smile, making _two_ turkey sandwiches now.

We spent most of the afternoon hanging out on Jake's coach talking. The sandwiches weren't bad, and Jake downed his in about five seconds, inhaled it was more of the word. I told him a lot about the random places I'd lived, and about my old best friend Alex, how we still exchanged e-mails but I felt his probably meant more to me than mine to him. Jake seemed to understand what I meant by it and not look at me like I had to heads. It made me respect Jacob a little bit more, like him just that extra little bit more than I did, just because he didn't judge me for it. His comprehension of me was good. And he talked to me a lot about what it would be like living in La Push and the schooling and things. The odd thing was that we never really touched on Paul, on why I was in his house, or that there were such things as werewolves for those few hours. We never even mentioned on the subject, though I could always feel it there. I wanted to be comfortable with Jake, and I was for the most part. But it was like there was always something behind our pleasant conversations, lurking and waiting for the right moment to jump out at us. The elephant in the room. I'd found out that there were such things as fictional beings the night before, something Jacob had already known, and yet we spoke about school and friends. It was very weird, but Jake was so funny and always kept things happy and light, kept me laughing and cheerful. It never left my head though, Paul's face, Paul's wolf form. Finally even Jacob's distractions weren't good enough. There was a small pause in the conversation and I ceased my chance.

"Jacob, what's going to happen?"

Recognition to what I was talking about hit his face and the smile dropped.

"What do you mean, 'what's going to happen'?" He countered carefully.

"Let's not play this as a game. I know you're not really _that_ ignorant." I told him.

"Okay, but pretend that I was, what are you asking me?"

"For help as a friend, someone I can trust, to explain to me what's going on with Paul. I want details. Details from someone I can look in the eye and not feel intense heat in my cheeks. Someone who I can talk to who wont spare me all the cheesy, 'I'm in love with you crap'. Can you please help me understand what the hell is going on? So I'll be prepared for when Paul comes back to talk to me."

Jacob sighed, thinking hard. Finally he said, "Alright, where do you want me to begin?"

"The beginning sounds good." I grinned at him.

"Fine, but Paul's going to get pissy with me. He wants to be the one to explain it all, some romantic crap, hoping to do this right, really unlike Paul. So I'm only agreeing to do this because he's one bad storyteller." He returned a nice grin back at me, playful almost, like a child getting caught doing something he knew was wrong.

...

I sat staring back at Jacob, still seated on the couch. That was more detailed than I had expected from him. He did as I requested, starting at the beginning of the Quileute's history. He told me about his people... and their enemies. The Cold ones, vampires as the movies call them, things I'd never believed in, mythical creatures the older kids used to scare the younger kids at school on Halloween. And the 'Protectors' of La Push, what Paul is. He said he wouldn't get into too many smaller stories, that Billy was much better at those stories than he was, that's what we would have heard the night I saw Paul... In his wolf form. He did tell me about his relatives, dating way back, and how it was always in Paul's blood to become this. He didn't have a choice. It was for the good of La Push, to keep everyone safe, it had always been this way. He touched on imprinting, telling me that to Paul, I was all he saw. I would only ever be what he would see, the things Paul had already told me. It gave me chills and creeped me out at the same time. Having someone else tell me it besides Paul almost verified it. And not that I would admit it out loud, but made me smile a bit internally that someone else knew and believed it too.

"So Paul has to go out alone and defend La Push against blood thirsty, murderous vampires?" I asked in disbelief.

"Well, no." Jake shifted uncomfortably. He just explained his history of werewolf ancestors to me and he goes odd on me now?

"I mean, didn't you say there was a pack back however many years ago? Why is Paul on his own?" I didn't like the idea of Paul defending his tribe from vampires at all. It made my pulse thump through my veins heavily, though I wasn't sure why exactly.

Jacob looked away from me. "I never said he went alone." He said evenly, quietly.

My mouth fell open and I gaped at him for a few moments, but he still wasn't looking at me. His eyes were turned to the muted T.V. There were others? There was more than one werewolf in La Push? Wow, the human race is really clueless to how many 'fictional' characters were around right beneath their noses.

"Who else? Is it anyone I've met, I mean I know I've only been here, what, two days? But do I know them? I thought Jared looked a bit sketchy but Kim would have mentioned it to me I think." I said when I finally found my voice, it was quick and blurry.

"Tara! We have strict rules. We can't just tell anyone. Only the maximum amount of people as possible," his eyes narrowed, "And we have to be able to trust them."

I knew that was meant as somewhat of a hint to me. That I had to keep it quiet. The world wasn't supposed to know that mythical creatures were real. Besides that I'd most likely get locked up for good, never to see the daylight again if I _did_ say anything. But that wasn't what I was concentrating on. I was concentrating on the 'we' Jacob had used. He said it twice and I knew he didn't make a mistake. He was holding back. We used 'we' as if to include himself. Jacob Black was a werewolf too.

Why hadn't I seen that?! I was an absolute idiot, right? Jake had the same build as Paul almost, taller, more muscled, but still huge. All of the guys I'd been hanging around with the last few days had been. Why hadn't I put two and two together? No humans looked like that. Especially not sixteen year old boys. Jacob must think I'm a complete idiot for not getting it right away. They all must think that about me. Sam, Jared, Quil, Embry, Paul, well maybe not Paul if I was his imprint. But Leah, her scornful face was in my mind too, smiling at the dumbass that hadn't gotten it, shed love this. My face started to feel hot and I tried to lower my face as much as possible so Jake couldn't see my plain embarrassment.

"You too then?" I said, peeking up enough to see Jacob's face. He hadn't realized he had let it slip out and he didn't quite know what to reply with. "Well I'm an idiot, huh? Took me this long to figure it out." I sighed a little, it hurt to breath.

"No, well... I guess that's my fault. Paul wanted to tell you earlier but I though that it would be too much information for you to handle at the moment. You're still new at weird." That must have come out wrong. I waited but Jake didn't correct what he said, that I'm 'new at weird' maybe it just didn't sound right to me then, because as I thought about it I realized that I was new at weird. At this weirdness anyway, at having friends as werewolves. It would take a while, but I did want to know all the information, no matter how strange it would seem. I wanted to be educated on this, if one could be educated on mythical creatures. Just to belong where I never thought anyone could belong. I'd never had a good group of friends but maybe I could fit in here. I was no werewolf, but if I was who Paul and Jacob thought I was, then maybe I could be a part of the strange gang too.

"So who all is it then?" I asked; happy Jacob didn't flat out agree I was an idiot to my face. It relaxed me slightly and I raised my face to meet his eyes. My skin still burned but not as intensely.

"I'm allowed to tell you this only because your Paul's imprint, if you were anyone else I'd be under strict instructions not to tell you, so you better not be some Tara impersonator." He gave me a quick smile but I nodded my head seriously, he rolled his eyes in response to that. "There's Sam, he's the leader of the pack. Me, I'm sort of second in command so to speak," He gave me a wicked 'Jacob grin' and continued, "Jared, Paul, Embry, Quil, Leah," Leah was one of them? I should have thought as much. She looked like no other girl I'd ever seen. "Her brother Seth," Ah, the infamous Seth, the one I'd never seen. "And there are some more you've never met. We'll all become familiar over time."

There was something else I wanted to ask Jacob. Something that was totally random and off topic, and embarrassing, but I was going to ask him anyway.

"Is Paul mad at me?"

"What?" Jacob looked at me confused.

"He didn't say much to me earlier, I was sort of a bitch... but I was just wondering... is he mad at me?" I looked down and heard Jacob laughing.

"I doubt _you_ were being the bitch Tara. Paul's got a temper, and also he _is_ the dog in this situation here, remember?"

"Yeah, I guess. So you don't think he's mad at me then?"

"I think that's almost impossible. He's pretty head over heals for you if you want to be like that. I've never seen him keep his temper for so long. He's trying so hard to stay calm." He looked at me, "That's how we phase you know. When we get mad. Most times anyway."

"I kind of figured." I muttered.

"Yeah. He wants you bad. Wants you to stay I mean. I thought he got determined over killing leeches, but this... whoa! The pack has to give you props on this one Tara. You've changed him more over two days than anyone else has ever been able to do." I was hearing the words, but they all seemed fake, even though they seemed real.

"I'm glad he's not mad at me." I said quietly changing the subject quickly.

Jacob nodded.

"Thanks for talking to me, Jake." I said, absolutely sincere. He smiled back at me.

"Anytime." He gave me a wink.

"When is he coming back?" my voice came out so quiet it could pass for a whisper, he knew what I meant.

Jacob stiffened up immediately and slowly his posture relaxed. He gave me a brilliant grin. "Now." He stood up, leaving me alone in the room.

Just then the front door opened and Paul came in casually, with a slight smile on his face. "Come on." He said to me, taking my hand and pulling me off the couch.

"What?" I asked, somewhat shocked. I pulled away from his burning hot touch.

He scoffed, "It's normal for me, you know. Being this hot, I thought you'd guess by now." He gave me a cocky grin.

"Actually, I had no idea you thought this way of yourself, nor considered men hot." I smiled a fake polite smile.

He just laughed. "Ready to go?"

"Umm, no. I'm staying here." I didn't know where he wanted to take me and I didn't want to go with him, well, I was a tad curious, but that was all. I probably looked God-awful and couldn't go anywhere anyway.

"No, actually, you're coming with me." He said matter-of-factly.

"I can't walk, Paul."

"It's okay, I won't let you fall." He moved closer, putting his warm arm around my waist.

"Please don't, my hand is bruised enough."

He sighed, letting me go. "I don't know how to do this, alright? Being overly confident doesn't seem to be working, but that's the way I've always done it with other girls. Your different though. How would you tell me to do this right? Help me out with this. What will it take to... woo you, I guess?" I smiled and plopped myself down on the couch.

"Oh, no. That's cheating, I can't help you." I told him. I liked the weak Paul a tad bit better than the cocky Paul.

"Please, just this once. That's all I'm asking for. Once, just to let me see how your brain works, give me something." I looked up into those dark brown pools, something I probably should stop doing, and softened a little bit.

"Well, it would help if you didn't _tell_ me what I'm doing, what _were_ doing. I'd like to be asked. And it's good to be confident, just not arrogant or haughty."

"Right." He looked serious, taking mental notes, this was so real. "So, I'll leave, and then come back, and you tell me if I do it right, okay?"

"Okay." I didn't really want him to leave, not _really_. I couldn't have it all though. Paul left the house and I thought he had meant he'd come back tomorrow or something, but two second after the door had closed I heard a light knock.

"Come in." I called, Jake was no where in sight to answer it, but I knew who would be behind the door anyway.

"Hi, uhm, Tara." Paul said like a nervous school boy asking a girl ten times out of his league to prom.

"Go easy on the lack of self esteem, more confidence." I prodded, amused by his acting. He was good at this. I liked how he wanted to make me so happy. Paul nodded, again making a mental note of what I had said.

"Would you please accompany me to dinner tonight? It would make my night, my life, fantastic." I stared at him in plain shock. That was the nicest thing I ever thought I would hear up until that moment. It made my heart flutter a bit. He had done it perfectly.

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	11. The Fallen Tree

**Okay, well, I _am_ aware I haven't updated in a while and I am incredibly sorry for that. I just haven't been inspired, or in the mood for writing this chapter, not a good excuse, I know, but I am super-di-duper sorry. I know, i'm really lame :( Thank you all for your patiences, it means a lot to me.**

**Special thanks to those of you who reviewed: Auphora66, said dance, candelifera, Bible Chick, bingo1000, ImprintOnMe, Aeieo, Dreamin.of.Scotland.and.Mexico, Siren to the Werewolves, carconee, StalkerishEmmettFan, witchbeth, irene0222, AmberGlow2, Soccerdog12, Twilight of the Dawn, the werewolf loverr, thank you all so much for reviewing :D lots of hugs!!**

**anyone else who is too shy to review but who is reading, I really want to thank you too!! :)  
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**A special thanks to Superdani, without your enthusiasm this chapter wouldn't be right now. thank you!! your great :D**

**If you find mistakes (grammar, punctuation, etc,) please dont kill me, I know, I am a horrible editor, but I've been trying really hard lately. Just message me and i will go back and change it. thanks. :)**

**I hope to make the next chapter better than this one is. It's more private conversations between them. Intimate secrets and whatnot. I'm looking forward to writing it, so it will probably be posted soon. Don't hold me to it, you know how I procrastinate. That's just the way I roll. :P**

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I promised myself I would be absolutely open-minded about this 'date' with Paul. I would try to get to know him better, as a person, and try to get the image of a giant wolf out of my mind whenever I saw him. I would see if he was an arrogant person and decide if I wanted to be around him. This would be my deciding night. I had made him promise as we drove in the car, the only conversation we had, that he would be absolutely nothing but himself. No fake, arrogant, haughty Paul. Just normal, human Paul. That was my only condition to this date.

"Sorry, I know it isn't much. La Push doesn't really have fancy restaurants and I didn't want to take you too far away from Jakes house, you know, in case of an emergency." Paul said as he helped me out of his grey little car. He hadn't said much to me on the drive to the restaurant, just gave me long glances that made me feel uncomfortable, half because I wanted him to watch the road, half because I didn't know what he was thinking about as he stared into me. I wished Jacob had come with us to lighten my spirits, but he had refused when I had invited him to come before we left. He looked as though he may say yes at first, until Paul shot him daggers with his eyes. Jacob then proceeded to decline my invitation.

The place wasn't that bad from the outside, it was small, but looked cozy. The sign simply read 'The Fallen Tree' How romantic, I thought sarcastically. Actually, when we entered the wooden building (did I mention that a lot of the buildings in La Push are wooden?) the lighting was dimmed and the tables all each had a small candle on them. It almost reminded me of a setting in a movie with the red tablecloths, slow music playing in the background, soft lighting. A pretty young waitress in her white shirt- black pants uniform greeted us with a brilliant smile, I was sure her teeth actually gleamed white. Her nametag read 'Gloria' and she escorted us to a booth near the back. Paul helped me into my side and gave me a tiny grin, he liked it back here I could tell, the privacy of it.

"Can I get you something to drink to start, hun?" She directed her voice to me, paper and pen in hand.

"Ice water please," I smiled shyly at her. I hated ordering at restaurants, I found it intimidating. Clark had always made fun of my public speaking skills, though I didn't find it very funny.

"Paul?" she asked; her polite tone dropping as she shrugged to the side to look at him. He scowled back.

"Coke," I didn't fail to notice how they disliked each other; I looked away to the wall, pretending to admire a painting of a creepy moose, "I'll me right back with that." She placed my menu in front of me and dropped Paul's in front of him with a bit of attitude about it, they weren't fond of each other. Gloria then walked away from us.

"What's that about?" I whispered lowly to Paul across the table from me.

Paul smiled at me, amused. "Before Jared imprinted on Kim he went out with her. Jared broke up with Gloria but she just couldn't leave it alone. I just got so fed up of her constant whining that they could work it out. She tried to make Kim's life a living hell too, which got me even more pissed off. Jared wouldn't say anything to her and finally I let my temper get the best of me. I screamed at her in front of the entire school in the cafeteria one day at lunch to stop being a creepy stalker and leave him alone, I still don't regret it, she's a popular bitch. She hates me; I'm surprised she's being so civil to you. She's being nicer to me than I would be if I was her." He looked over his shoulder in the direction that Gloria had gone. "I suppose I wouldn't have brought you here if I had of known she worked here. She'll most likely poison my food." He grinned, but there was a tiny bit of actual worry in his eyes. It made me laugh a little bit. He liked when I laughed, pure pleasure lit up on his face that he was able to accomplish my laughter. It didn't surprise me that random people in La Push disliked Paul but I was glad they didn't have anything against me. Against me _yet_ anyway, who knew what I would do wrong here? At least he stuck up for his friends. That showed loyalty, didn't it? Did Paul loose his temper a lot with his friends? A lot of them could handle it, being... werewolves. I cringed at the thought of saying that. It seemed so surreal to me still. Mythical creatures. The guy I was sitting across from at this very moment was a wolf. But he wasn't likely to loose his temper with me, not with his...imprint? There was need for worry; I'd seen it in everyone's faces. They were anxious and afraid for me, to see what would happen. He had gotten angry and frustrated at me at Jacobs house, but I wasn't afraid of being hurt by him. I was just as frustrated and upset with him as I was sure he felt. Then again, I couldn't explode into a giant wolf.

"Do you know what you're getting?" I asked him, opening up my own menu, turning my mind away from the thought of his wolf form as it snuck into my mind, and away from if Paul got angry at me and exploded.

"Umm," He looked down at the menu in front of him. "I'll probably just end up getting what you're having, times two."

"Times two?" I asked sceptically.

"What? It takes a lot to keep a werewolf going. Look at me," He gestured to his large exterior, grinning devilishly.

"Oh. I see." I replied simply. Of course it did. I was dense. I was surprised he had used the word 'werewolf' so casually. It sounded very odd to my ears. No one would be able to hear our conversations anyway from where we were away from the main part of the restaurant.

"What _are_ you getting?" Now it was his turn to be sceptical.

"Why? Are you a picky eater?" I grinned, trying to lighten up my uncomfortable mood. I was pretty much okay now with him, but still slightly on edge. It was odd how easy it was to be with Jacob, but not to be with Paul, who wouldn't judge anything I do as bad or wrong. My morals were seriously messed up.

"Nah, but if it's a veggie plate, I think I'll pass." He smiled back.

"Well, I _was_ thinking about getting a salad," He cringed a bit, "But then I thought about a burger and fries." I watched for the reaction on his face.

"That isn't very fancy food; I'm not that poor you know. I can pay for something more... exotic." He probably would have gagged at that sentence if someone else was with him, but for me he got it out.

"That's quite alright. I'm not really one for exotic foods." I assured him.

"Three hamburgers and fries then?" He made sure. I nodded and closed my menu, placing it on top of his own that he had never opened.

Gloria came back shortly after that with the water and coke and took our orders, then left us again.

"So what type of music are you into?" Paul asked as soon as she had walked away and was out of sight.

I had just taken a big drink of water and had to swallow, "Umm, like bands? Or do you mean classical or hip-hop?" I tried to classify the question.

"I mean what artists. Who is on you iPod right now?" He leaned in closer to me across the table.

"Well, I've always has this kind of obsession with Muse. I think they're brilliant." A smile lit up his face. "You like them too?" I smiled, surprised he had heard of them. Not many Americans had. A radio station in London had gotten me hooked on their music when I had lived there.

"No, I think the lead singer has a whiny voice. Continue," He prodded, smile never leaving his face. He didn't like them, thought Matthew Bellamy had a whiny voice, but yet was pleased I liked them... okay?

"I like," I let my voice drag out on the 'like' as I thought about it. "I have an odd passion for Blink-182. I love them. I think they're hilarious and most of their lyrics mean something important. They aren't afraid to embarrass themselves. I think that's great."

"They're not bad. Who else?" He was very interested on the topic of the type of music I liked, smiling happily as he listened.

"I don't know...uhm... My Chemical Romance isn't bad; I'm a fan of Breaking Benjamin because of my friend Alex. He loves them, got me hooked. I guess its okay because I got him obsessed with The Killers." I smiled at how close Alex and mines music tastes were. He liked music that made your ears bleed and had extremely complex lyrics, I was pretty much game for anything he was. How many really bad indie concerts had we gone to I had lost count. "Who do you like?" I asked, honestly curious.

"Linkin Park mostly. What's your favourite movie?" It figured he listened to Linkin Park. Angry, bitter lyrics. I liked them too, but it fit Paul so well.

"The Graduate. I love Dustin Hoffman. He's so versatile it's amazing." The rest of the evening went on like this. He would ask lots of random questions about my favourite things and different people. Flowers, stones, colours, places, actors, activities, things about my family, old friends. He wasn't very thorough answering my questions about him though, only the barest details. Just question after question about me. I hated talking about myself but the smile on his face and the happy look in his eyes made me keep going. He only stopped the questions when the food came but in between bites there would be more.

"Thanks," I said with a small smile to Gloria. She smiled back and sent another dirty look to Paul before walking away. I tried to suppress my laughter until she was safely out of sight.

"If I die within the next twenty-four hours, you'll tell the police she poisoned me, right? Maybe even avenge me death? Okay, don't do that, you might be locked up, but you'll have her arrested, wont you?"

"Of course." I now laughed freely with Paul. I no longer felt uncomfortable with just him and I after he practically knew everything about me. Who knew how long that comfort would last? But I thought I may as well laugh while I still felt as ease.

Watching Paul eat was absolutely disgusting. He had no table manners at all. Food flew out of his mouth and he was worse than watching Alex sip soup or eat spaghetti, it would wind up all over his face and in his hair. With Paul he tried to push as much into his mouth as possible and then take a sip of his coke, the pop dribbling down his chin because his mouth was at its maximum food capacity. As much as it made me want to vomit at this typical teenage boy behaviour, I had no control over the laughter that came from the amusingly disgusting scene.

"Didn't your mother ever teach you to chew with your mouth shut?" I asked after him jokingly.

He swallowed the big lot of food in his mouth and took another drink to wash it down. "Nah, my mom died when I was seven. She wasn't much of a role model or much of a mother then anyway."

"Oh. I'm really sorry about that." I bowed my head slightly, sorry to have brought that up.

Paul shrugged, "Not your fault." He said, taking another big bite out of his second hamburger.

I was pretty much full after that. I hadn't finished all of my fries and I still had a small piece of the bun from my burger left on my plate. When Paul had finished his he eyed my plate with hunger. I pushed my plate toward him.

"You want them?" I asked, smiling. I hated when food went to waste. That would be a major plus to having werewolves as friends; they always seemed to be hungry. That must be good for La Push's economy, I thought. Paul smiled sheepishly as he accepted my plate and popped some fries into his mouth.

The bill came shortly after that but Paul wouldn't tell me how much it cost. I wasn't a complete imbecile, I knew how to multiply and then add on the percent of the tax. But I don't think Paul thought of that. I didn't mention how much it cost either; it wasn't that expensive for a few hamburger meals, but it was sweet of him to pay anyway. He also tipped Gloria; he didn't say why because he showed nothing but contempt for her all throughout our time there as she did to him, but I guessed it was because she was so kind to me. After having Paul scream at her once for picking on a girl he wasn't even with, he would have really had a go with her if she made a comment about the girl he _was_ with. And because I'm his imprint that would have really set him off. The thought made me shiver to think of the waitress ripped into shreds, pieces all over the ceiling and the walls. How morbid, I chided myself.

Paul helped me out of my booth and walked me to the door. The rest of the people in the restaurant watched us with plain curiosity, I took it that Paul didn't go to places like this often, and if he did he probably wouldn't take many girls. There were whispers and strange looks. Paul scowled at anyone he saw doing this. There were some local girls sitting near the front of the restaurant that started giggling at us, me more than him I supposed, his hearing _was_ better than mine. He growled lowly as a warning, starting to tremble, and they stared back with fright on their faces and then quickly diverted their eyes. Did they know what he was? Or were their instincts just kicking in, warning them they'd gone too far? His steps started to go towards them.

"It isn't worth it." I whispered, rubbing my hand on his arm. His face didn't look satisfied, but he stopped trembling and continued on our way to the door.

"It would be a lot easier for me to just carry you." He told me, his voice a tiny bit on edge, still ticked about the girls.

"Well, I'll never heal if my body doesn't get used to it." The pain killed and his invitation was somewhat inviting, but I did want to get better so it wouldn't look too conspicuous to my parents.

"You know, if you were a werewolf you'd of healed already by now. One of the upsides to the curse." He sighed as he opened the passenger door of his car, helping me in and then shutting it with a bang afterward.

We drove again in silence, but I was now more relaxed with Paul. I had some questions for him.

"How many...vampires," it felt odd saying that word, "Are there actually around here?"

"Just the occasional ones passing through. There were a group, house, cult, whatever, living up in Forks. Seven of them. They recently added another member to their... family."He spit out that word. "Jacob wouldn't let us kill them, even though they broke the treaty."

"Why would Jake get any say in that? I thought Sam was in charge." I said, confused.

"Jakes second in command around here. The pack has to listen to him too. His great grandfather was the last chief, so it really has to do with ancient respect issues." Paul explained as he drove, keeping his eyes now on the road. Go Jake, I thought internally.

"Why'd he let them go if they broke the treaty?" They must have trusted these vampires.

"Bella," He pronounced the name like it was a bitter poison in his mouth, his face scrunched up. I didn't pry into that reaction.

"How did the vampires survive if they weren't allowed to bite people? Was it only in La Push they couldn't kill?" I decided to ask, that was also confusing me.

"First of all, biting someone and drinking their blood isn't the same thing. Biting them changes them" So someone had been changed. "Secondly, to answer your question, they hunted animals, not humans. I was hoping they'd slip up ever since I'd been changed, but they never did. Then they left soon after I had my first phase, so what the hell was the point of all of our suffering and becoming werewolves if we got no action? If they were just going to leave? It wasn't fair. But then they'd made a miscalculation about some other bloodsuckers, leading them here, leaving the girl unprotected. That was one good thing about her, she was always entertaining, bringing hell wherever she went. We got to fight with a few leeches until the 'civil' ones eventually came back." he scoffed. "And then there was this big war shit with a bunch of stupid newborns; that was fun while it lasted I guess. I killed off one on my own, six accompanying Jared and Sam." The thought of Paul frightening vampires, that he could die, gave me chills of fear up and down my spine, and also made me angry. I didn't want him to have to, but I kept my mouth shut and let him keep talking. "After that there were very few other leeches that came around here, except for the Cullen's, the ones in Forks. Then they broke the treaty when they changed Bella and fled." Bella was the girl? A few days at the cafe when Jacob had stormed out, the girl Embry has told me about, the one who had pained Jacob.

"Were 'Bella' and Jake... close?" I asked quietly, looking at my hands folded on my lap.

"He didn't imprint on her if that's what you mean. No, I mean, he loved her, and I'm sure she might have loved him too, maybe. It was just that the leech loved her too, and she loved him more. It pretty much killed Jake."

"That's sad." I didn't really know what else to say.

"Yeah, it is. But that's his story. This is ours." He smiled at me, his deep brown eyes penetrating into me, I smiled back at him at rested my head on his warm shoulder, not really thinking, it just felt so natural. He stiffened for a moment, and then his whole body seemed to relax. He didn't make a comment on this position.

"Are you tired? Do you want to go back to Jakes?" He asked; concern in his voice.

"No!" I answered too quickly, and too loudly. Paul laughed at me happily. I blushed, my face felt even hotter now than it would be if I had just left it on his blazing hot arm. I was afraid that if I left Paul, he wouldn't be the same person he was tonight with me, he'd transform back into the arrogant Paul. I wasn't ready to give this Paul up yet, I didn't want to admit it, but I liked spending time with him. "I mean," I corrected, "Its early yet, can't we go somewhere else?" I sat up, turning my body to face him.

"I think I know the right place." He said, smile alighting all of his features. "It may take a while to get there though." He warned.

"That's okay, I don't mind." I leaned against his arm again, closing my eyes, again. I smiled with content as I listened to the sounds of the vibrating car, the quiet night, Paul's even breathing. Forget my pillow, this seemed like heaven now. I was absolutely at bliss and I wasn't too sure why. I was so at ease, so peaceful. This felt right.

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